mad
adj 1: roused to anger; “stayed huffy a good while”- Mark Twain;
It’s Friday and I don’t normally post anything but SPF on Friday…but as you can see, I’m a bit in a huff.
I got some stuff floating around that if I don’t get off my chest there is a good chance I will ice pik the next bastard that comes within arms reach of me.
- I DID NOT STEAL HIM AWAY. Really, I was like 18 years old and he was 28. If I had ANY clue you even exsisted, I would have RAN (not walked) because girl, you have mental problems. You scare me. No one, NO ONE person should carry around that much anger and resentment for another person. It makes you ugly with bitterness. Stop blaming me for your inablity to regain a life. It’s been like 16 years…move on. Find someone that is going to love you for who you are. Find someone. He’s not really THAT much of a catch. HONESTLY, I was married to him remember? We split up 6 years ago, if he was going to come running back, he would have by now. MOVE ON. Stop blaming me for everything. Oh, and just so you know…all those text messages- you should really be careful what you write because someone might let someone else read them. Can you say, EWWWWWW?
- Dude, for real…quit with telling people about my private life.
- Take some damn responsibilty for the people in your life. Quit EXPECTING people to bend over backwards to make your life easier because you have been done wrong in the past. The world…it’s not revolving around you. The world revolves around who is getting booted of American Idol and you need to learn that. Sit down, shut up and take some responsiblity.
- The hate mailing people. Thank you. Thank you for taking a vacation. I probably shouldn’t say anything because it will just egg you on to write me more, but for the last two weeks you have been so nice as to not point out that I am a horrible person.
- Dog, QUIT THE DAMN BARKING. I know life is unfair. You’ve told me that a million times. I have mentioned many times that you could have been a goner if it wasn’t for the boy saving your butt and bringing you home. All I ask is you pee OUTSIDE. You don’t BARK the whole time you’re out there and looking at me like I am Cruelella. Also, might I add…QUIT CHEWING ON MY DAMN FLIP FLOPS! Quit eating crayons, Quit shedding ALL THAT HAIR ALL OVER MY HOUSE. Is it really asking that much?
- House, CLEAN YOURSELF! I’m tired of doing it. The kids are tired of doing it.
- The ‘boinging’ gas light in my car. QUIT BOINGING! I know, YOUR EMPTY. FILL YOURSELF UP YOU LAZY ASS CAR!
- Television, STOP WITH THE STUPID REALITY SHOWS! American Idol and Project Runway are the only two we need.
- Fat ass, SHRINK or spread the fat other places! Quit hogging all of it. Can you give some to my scalp or the bottom of my feet where no one can see it!!?? Selfish bastard!
- Laundry…you just need to stop.All of my ‘huffyness’ isn’t directed to anyone that reads my blog. Except the hate mail people. These are my everyday problems with my everyday people or objects.I know i’m going to get hatemail from the Laundry Advocates now.
37 responses to “Grr.”
Dear Kristine,
As president of the SFBTOL (or the Society for the Better Treatment of Laundry) I am incensed, INCENSED I tell you, that you expect your laundry to do itself. It just is not gonna happen sister. You need to go do and do it gently, kindly if you will. It is because of people like you that we had to create this coalition.
Now go buy some Downy and Snuggle.
(Hope this made you laugh!)
Woman, you are NOT allowed to be so grumpy on a Friday. This is Monday kind of crap.
And really, do people have anything better to do than to send nasty emails to complete strangers on the internet? I don’t get that at all.
The dog eats crayonz? REALLY?
I’ll take him.
This has been a shitty week all the way around.
FYI the most recent blogger in the spotlight is up! Woo HOo!
kristine, you need to back off of the gasoline light. THEY HAVE RIGHTS TOO, BY GOLLY! they are so misunderstood, the poor things. God created them for the sole purpose of ‘boinging,’ yet here they are, getting trashed. i cry for them. take it back, i demand it!!! ;)))
I know you wrote this entry to vent but know that it provided some amusement as well. My favorite parts:
“The world revolves around who is getting booted of American Idol and you need to learn that.”
“Dog, QUIT THE DAMN BARKING. I know life is unfair.” It is unfair…I wish I was a dog.
“Television, STOP WITH THE STUPID REALITY SHOWS! American Idol and Project Runway are the only two we need.” Whoa Sister in blogging…slow down… we also need Survivor.
P.S. Does the dog poop the same color as the crayons he eats.
P.S.S. Never ever be mad at the dog. They just rock!
Just send your laundry over. That’s what I’m doing today.
I just remembered that I need to fill my gas tank before I go home tonight… and you are hysterical! have I told you this? No, I don’t mean hysterical in the you’re-a-loon kind of way… you make people smile. Always love your honesty!
Tell that bitch to get a life and leave you alone! Or we will all gang up on her. Hey, maybe you should post her e-mail address and we can flood her with mail!
Are you sure my dog isn’t hanging out at your house. No, wait, I hear mine barking and he’s INSIDE the freaking out. Sheesh. Yeah, I can relate to that one.
Yeah, give your laundry to Kami. She’ll get it all fluffy and shit.
And I’m obviously braindamaged b/c I typed “he’s inside the freaking out” that would be “he’s inside the freaking house.”
Gee # 1 sounds like what I say to my ex. Loser.
Count me in on # 6,7,9 & 10. Especially the laundry. I think in school they need to teach kids that you will do X many loads of laundry PER child you have for the next 18 years. See how many babies they’d have then.
Just think, if I could transer a couple inches of fat to the bottom of my feet I’d be 5′ 10″, which would be so awesome. What a great idea!
I’d like you to take back the reality show shit. I TOTALLY need AI and Runway…but I defiantly couldn’t live without ANTM, Survivor, Amazing Race and the Apprentice. Mmmmmm yeeeeah. I think I have a reality tv problem cuz I could totally keep going.
Hello my name is Boob Sweat and I’m addicted to all that is reality.
There is only one way to stop the laundry.
Get nekkid.
Nope, AI is not a necessary reality show for the universe (nor is Survivor or the Apprentice). Runway, ANTM and The Amazing Race—that’s where it’s at!
The main reality show I watch is NOVA, but I guess it doesn’t count because PBS is supposed to be the educational channel, our tax dollars doing good deeds and all that.
The dog barking has an echo about 4 houses down our street. Don’t the owners know a fence doesn’t stop NOISE?
And Golly, someone holding resentment for 16 years because of a man would scare anybody. Are the tv cameras nearby? because your week could make a great movie.
Take Metro’s advice. Nekkid on the weekend.
You’re HOT when you’re huffy ;)
Okay. It sounds like someone in your life needs a good sound ass-kicking. Where do I sign up? I’ll handle her for you.
When your ass does what you want it to, will you have it please come talk to mine? For some reason asses are so very selfish like that.
American Idol, Project Runway, AND – Americas Next top Model. I was addicted to that one first, it led me to project runway. And I shouldn’t admit it, but this is the first season I have watched American Idol, because darn it, I just had to be able to know what the blogs are talking about :)
I concurr
Sounds serious. You really should consider getting a restraining order against the woman who is harrassing you. No one should have to put up with that.
Also, I can’t stand people who view themselves as victims. Grow up and move on already and take some responsibility for your life!
Kristine, could you email me? stampgirll@hotmail.com
If you still want some ideas for SPF that is…I looked all over your site, can’t find your email…
Stacie
This is my favorite part……
“…I would have RAN (not walked) because girl, you have mental problems. You scare me. No one, NO ONE person should carry around that much anger and resentment for another person. It makes you ugly with bitterness. Stop blaming me for your inablity to regain a life.”
I am living vicariously through you….and LAUGHING MY ASS off because I could not possibly relate to this more. Thanks for giving me some humor to go with my reality!
You want the ass fat to go to your boobs. But not a lot. Who wants to have to go buy a ton of new bras? Just enough to fill out the bras you have nicely.
Doesn’t your man know that his duty as your significant other is to fill the car with gas? You gotta train him. Show him the boinging light and show him what he’s suppose to do when it makes noise. Then give him a biscuit and hope he learned.
Thank you for saying what we were all thinking. I know in my life the first one really applies. Thanks
i am surprised how many comments and emails I got saying that number #1 hit home for them and they have the same problem.
Whoa. I know i’m not the only one out there that has had this problem with freaky ex’s — but whoa. we could start a gang!
I swear, I was afraid to walk outside alone at night because I thought she was hiding in the bushes ready to attack me.
hilarious as always, sis. blog therapy.
there, there…..let it all out (and you do). that’s why everybody loves you – you show everyone else that your “fairy-tale” life (rotflmfao) is just as fukd up as the rest of ours. yer da best.
guess i should apologize for ever serving that bitch those papers for ya. mighta prevented it all.
Um, hello? You forgot America’s Next Top Model. GOSH! I am so totally offended. (It’s on right before Veronica Mars! I couldn’t help it! It sucked me right in…) ANTM is waaaaaaaay better than Project Runway, I tell you what… Okay. FINE. I’ve never seen Project Runway, but still! I bet it is!
And I refuse to watch even ONE more reality show because they are sucking the creative energy right out of television and stealing audiences from stellar shows (in both writing and acting) such as Veronica Mars and the late Arrested Development. Humph.
And dude, who is this chica who refuses to live in the now? Does she live nearby? And if so, do I have permission to kick her ass? (I take Tae Bo, you know, and watch TONS of Buffy reruns– she better watch her back, that’s all I’m saying.)
I so love your list!! A lot of those things piss me off too, like the one about gas & the tv!! Oh and reality TV, i’m sick of it being a trend!! argh!!
you still haven’t dress shopped yet? Wow! When you do you better post lots and lots of pictures!!! the bridesmaid dresses came in last week and now they are hanging up in my apartment and i want to put them on and dance around =]
You sounds like you could use a hug (sorry it’s so late, but I live far away from you lol).
*hugs*
When you discover how to make the house clean itself, let me know how you did it.
Preach on!
Man that woamn has problems if she is holding that grudge for 16 years. Get a life already!
I find a Singapore whipping cane always motivates my laundry back into shape. Use with prejudice and watch your laundry do itself! =)
AuggieBoy,
Awwww, you’re so sweet. AuggieBoy is Kevin (Dashababy’s Husband) and that makes him my brother in law.
Kevin knows all our lame family secrets and see’s the show that goes on behind the curtain. AND HE STILL LOVES US!
Oh and Cat…I wish I could let you!
A-freaking-men to Number 3. God do I know someone who thinks this, lives by this, and will die by this. Just because you have been done wrong, for crying out loud, doesn’t mean you deserve the damn world. If enough people understood this fact, the world would be a much less annoying place.
As for the laundry, HELL YEAH. I spent all day yesterday washing clothes and my man’s dirty underwear. Could the man HAVE any more dirty underwear? Or any more underwear for that matter? Because when I leave the laundry a few extra days and he doesn’t have any clean underwear he won’t DO the laundry himself but will go OUT and buy more freaking underwear. So girl, I feel your pain on that one.
As for the chick who still can’t get over the fact that you “stole” her man 16 years ago, she needs some heavy therapy.
Screw the laundry! My laundry revolted and strangled my dryer! I think I overheard it plotting to take out the washer, earlier. I know the washer is skeered because it was squealing as I put more in it…
As for the crazy lady with the 16 year grudge… Get over yourself, you aren’t that impoertant. Really.
As always you rock our worlds Kristine! You’ve got me roflmao!
You are too damned funny!