• Random and Odd

    Thank you for giving. I’ll take real good care of it.



    Maui 2011, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

    Everyone is doing the “I’m Thankful for…” the whole month of November until Thanksgiving on Facebook again this year. I have done a few, but they were always the funny things that get overlooked, like Qtips.

    Last year on my blog I pointed out the small things I am grateful for. Looking over it, I am still grateful for those things, but this time I want to be thankful for this year as a whole.

    I have been reading about my friends and what they have had to go through this year and my first thing I am grateful for is my health and the health of my children. SO many of my friends spend hours on the road driving their very young children to get Chemotherapy sessions far away from home. When some parents are stressing about their kids unmade beds, I have another parent who is stressing on her son’s blood cell count. I’m hoping Alyx gets a good hair cut for her school pictures and one of my friends is hoping her kid doesn’t get teased because her daughter has no hair yet because the chemo made it fall out.
    Are you kids not getting good grades in school? I have a friend whos kid is homeschooled because he is in the hospital so much because of brittle bones. Facebook has shown me that as a parent, I am so lucky that my kids are where they are. If not happy…at least HEALTHY.

    Speaking of happy. This time last year I was in a weird place with Lester. We were broke up/still seeing each other and I was right on the brink of getting ready to get over him and move on. I told him once, the best thing you ever did was leave me because you showed me that I can get over you too. I’ve said it before, but losing what we had last year was harder than the loss of my marriage. The marriage loss hurt was for the girls and all that they would lose. When Lester and I broke up, it was all my loss.
    This year we are on a whole different train. I’m not sure when It got easier, but it has. Does he still drive me crazy? Yes. He does. Does he want to strangle me at every turn? Yup. Right now, the happy outweighs everything else. There are times when we are together and I look over at him and he smiles and it’s the most real smile I have ever seen. For those of you that don’t know Lester, he’s not big on smiling or showing that he’s happy. In the 2 years we have been together he’s gotten so much better at just letting go and being dorky with me. This will come as a shock to some of you, but I’m not a super serious person. When it’s OUR time, be it just the two of us or when his son is there, or my kids…we can just laugh and make jokes. I am grateful for the love we have for each other. I am grateful that we can have two different lives in two different towns and 99% of the time we are flawless when it comes to dividing time and how we are when we aren’t together. I am grateful for our Sundays. I leave early in the morning and I trail run all day and then at the end of the day I watch him play hockey. It might have not been enough for someone else, but it’s perfect for me. I am grateful.

    Oh the gratefulness just keeps coming. I miss Kara so much, but I am so happy that we have a place that we talk and she can spill her heart out. Her writing has gotten so good, it’s like a novel I don’t want to put down. Every day I want her to come home because the missing of her is out of control, but I know she’s still testing out those wings and soon she will fly. It probably won’t be home that she lands, but she better always circle back because she is my other half in this life. She is the other half of her sisters and she better come back and spend more time with her baby sister because she needs her.
    She sent me a text as I was sitting in the chair to get the tattoo. “Just Breath” she says to me. Her and I had been going back and forth about the tattoo design. I had told her not to get a tattoo that she will regret or one that links her to someone. “After ALL that you told me, you are getting Lester’s tattoo? ARE YOU CRAZY!? What if he does something horrible to you and you have to look at that every day and think of it?”
    She has a point, but I also had mine. I’m not a tattoo person, AT ALL. I made a deal with Lester and even though I thought he would never really do it, he did it. My part of the deal was I get a tattoo. I told Kara that no matter if I got the tattoo 15 years after Lester and I broke up, that first tattoo would ALWAYS be the ‘bet’ tattoo and as soon as I got it, no matter who I was with or the meaning of the tattoo, it would be, “yeah, this is the one I should have gotten when I was with Lester.”
    People have done some shitty things and I don’t need a tattoo to remember it. I have a good memory.
    This tattoo is our tattoo now. He was gracious enough to share it with me and I cherish it. This will always remind me of the most amazing year I have ever had. It symbolizes the changes in my life and the commitment I have made to change and grow. This tattoo is the year I took on mountains and I won. This was the year I Let Go.
    “If it gets too bad mom, just hold your breath when it hurts and breath when it doesn’t.”
    I found that I can hold my breath for ten straight minutes. ;)
    I’m grateful that my daughter always knows when it’s a bad day it’s a root beer day. I am grateful that she knows the exact moment to call when the needle went in and when to shut up about it.

    The big things year I am grateful for. My car, by the grace of GOD is still on the road, getting me to point B. I am healthy. I can recognize a good day and know a bad day might be right around the corner, but being grateful for THAT day and live in the day, not the week or year. To recognize the strength I have and build from there. The love I am lucky to have from an amazing man. My family…my sister because that woman…she puts up with sooooooooooooooooo much.

    I am grateful for what I do have and not jealous for what I don’t have. I’ve thrown away a lot in my life and I’ve learned from it. Being able to see the goodness of this life and what is left of it is what I have learned this year. NEVER take for granted the calmness in your life, because once you start getting petty and snide…shit will get real and it could get VERY UGLY.

    Just sayin’.

  • Random and Odd

    Sometimes you got to go through Hell before you get to Heaven…

     turtle.jpg

    Another 4am morning.

    I got up this morning and made a pot of coffee while Lester snored away.  One of the patio doors was barely cracked open and I could hear this high wind coming from outside.  It sounded like I was in the middle of a hurricane.  Looking out at the courtyard you can see the trees bending in t

    before we left California I checked the weather forecast and it said each day was going to be windy with showers.  It also said it was going to be 83 degrees. So far we have had the winds, no showers and it’s been a lot warmer than I thought it was going to be.
    On the news yesterday morning the weather woman said, “Grab your jacket before you leave!”
    After our 2nd shore dive yesterday and we were driving home in our wet clothes, windows down I had to laugh…yeah, this is coat weather.
    I finally opened the patio door, expecting the high winds to be cold.  Nope, warm. I love Maui.

    We had a change of plans yesterday because the boat fix didn’t work.  We ended driving to the other part of Maui and doing a beach dive.  Both of us have dove this part of the island. 15 years ago I did this dive and I got my ass kicked by the coral reef when I went up to high and got caught in the surf.  This time I stayed low and only came up when I wanted to go into a cave or through an arch.
    The first dive was amazing. It made up for the shit dive we did on Monday to the boat.   It takes awhile to get back in the swing of Scuba. The technical side of it is easy, it’s the relaxing and enjoying the view that gets forgotten when making sure all the technical stuff is taken care of.
    The first dive we saw the whole spectrum of fish.  My favorite are always the bright yellow fish, but this time I was enamored by this tye dye looking fish.  This little guy was enormous and was spitting out rock and sand endlessly. He was a comedy act to watch.

    After that dive we drug our asses back up the beach and washed off and headed to get food.  Is 10:30 am to early for rum?  We got back to the condo after the best lunch and I laid down while Lester download the pictures.  Within minutes I was out.  He gave me a whopping 25 minute nap before waking me up and telling me that the clouds were dark where we were going to do our second dive and we needed to get moving to beat the storm.
    It was dark and the beach we were going to dive from was choppy so we decided to do the same dive we had done earlier that morning.
    This time we saw turtles, eels, trumpet fish and this amazing arch.  The snorkelers had told us they saw a couple reef sharks in a cave and my goal was to find those sharks to get in close to get a picture.  I located the cave they said they saw it in and I went in very slow, stopping my bubbles so I could focus in each direction.  Just as I was about into the dark part of the cave, a yellow fish darted out from behind some coral and scared the living shit out of me. I screamed and did this sissy ass back swim.  Turning around I looked for Lester, hoping he didn’t see me have that freak out moment.  Nope, he saw something shiny and wasn’t paying attention.  I decided that if I was going shark hunting, I better make sure that Lester is there to make sure he can get a picture of the shark that is likely going to take off my arm.

    At about 1500 lbs of air it was time to turn around, I made my way up and over this reef and it opened up into this pocket of amazingness.  The big yellow fish that had been leading the way to this slice of heaven didn’t steer me wrong.  I made my way through this coral arch and out into another pocket with a cave.
    I turned around again to watch Lester come through the arch and I smiled.
    This is my dive buddy now. This is the person I trust with my life with.

    With that thought, I promise to take him more seriously when he’s pointing out that he’s running out of air in his tank.

  • Random and Odd

    “Of all the timezones, God loves Hawaii the most.”



    Maui 2011, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

    I rolled over this morning expecting it to be long past 4am because I had woken up so many times that I was sure I had overslept our 6:30 wake up alarm.
    Looking over Lester’s body to the clock I had to giggle. “4am.”
    He said, “Ready to get up?” He was awake too and ready to start our day.

    Yesterday we did a shore dive outside the resort we are staying at. We wanted to test out the underwater camera and the ‘water resistant’ box we got to put the electronic key to the car in so we can beach dive in other places. The camera housing held up wonderfully. The water resistant box is not waterproof.
    There is this large military ship/boat docked out by our resort. It’s a really good distance away, but I was sure we could swim out to it. I had forgotten how heavy scuba gear is when you have to haul it down to a beach, put it on, swim to the dive spot, drop down and dive for 20 minutes, swim back and then haul it all back up…soaking wet with noodles for arms and legs.
    I did really well on the way out there. When the dive was over I looked back at the shoreline that looked about 20 miles away. In my head I little conversation that went just like this; “Fuuuuuuuckkkk meeeee. I did NOT think this all the way through. Okay, Kristine we are going to just swim and keep swimming and aim for the middle of the resort. I got this.”
    That little pep talk got me about half way there and that’s when I realized I wasn’t using my legs when I was swimming. I was doing this little kid kicking and had resorted to dog paddling. It was time to pep talk myself again, “Oh knock this shit off Kristine and kick your goddammn legs! “ I took off again and with little doubts of being able to make it slipping in and having to squash them down we made it back to the beach. A huge wave came and I let it pick me up and I walked right up on the beach. It wasn’t the image I had in my head the whole time I was swimming back in. The scene in my head involved me crawling up, spitting salt water, crying and grabbing my cramping legs.
    Nope. It was yet another moment where I realized I am so much stronger than I give myself credit for. I’m physically stronger than I thought I was.

    Lester and I went over to our friend’s house and helped him fix his boat and then afterward he took me up to Lahaina where we walked around and went into all these shops. I found Alyx’s necklace I told her I would get her. This was my strategy to make sure Alyx loved it; pick what my sister Kathy would love and Alyx will love it.
    With Marina, I knew what she wanted, but I had no idea what design she would want. After a few days of pricing every single hippy bag I could find I finally found a place that was reasonable and I took a picture and texted it to her to ask her what design she liked. She picked the one I would have NEVER picked for her. Two of the 4 girls are taken care of and now I just need to find Kara and Shea their gifts and since Lester likes to shop, I won’t need to panic and do last minute airport shopping.

    Today we are doing a double boat dive to work on the reef. I’ve never done this before, but we are putting on all our gear then putting a whole other gear set together and then taking it down with us. When we run out of air we just take off our gear and move over into the other gear. This will make it so we don’t have to resurface and change tanks.

    Depending on how tired we are after working on the reef, Lester said he will take me to the 7 sacred pools and down the road to Hana. I am almost TOO excited about this.

    I was talking to Marina and Alyx back at home and they said it’s freezing and off and on raining. The woman at the hot tub last night mentioned post vacation depression. Thinking about going back already is sad. It’s days away, but I want to make sure I don’t miss a moment and memory.

    It’s only Tuesday and I since my day is starting out at 4am, I have hours to go make those memories!!

  • Random and Odd

    Not a single complaint.



    Maui 2011, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

    This is my second morning in Maui and again I can’t sleep past 4am. Yesterday I did the same thing, but I wasn’t alone. Lester and I were both awake and too excited to sleep.
    This morning I have the patio doors wide open and even though it’s still dark outside I can hear the waves crashing on the beach. Hot Kona coffee and sounds of the ocean in Maui … now that’s the best part of waking up!

    Yesterday was our first full day on the island. We met our friend of many years to take out on his boat to go scuba diving. It’s been a couple years since we went scuba diving and 2 years ago I had a devil may care attitude about life and wasn’t nervous at all. In fact, so much as I was the only one out of 4 that did the first dive…and without a dive buddy. Yesterday, my nerves got the best of me before I even got out on the boat. Lester asked if I was okay and I told him I was nervous. He asked why I was nervous and I had no response…”because I am.” And he came back with, “well stop. Stop being nervous.”
    I love that man more than most things, but truly sometimes he’s just straight retarded. He realized that was a lame comment and he smiled and messed up my hair. He’s learning that he must quickly redeem himself before I raise my eyebrows at his volume of stupidity. His smiles defuse any explosive situation he might have created.
    Our friend, Bill who lives on the island asked how I was doing and told him the same thing. “It’s alright, Darlin’. You’ll be fine. I’m right here and I’ll make sure you’ll be safe.” BINGO. He nailed that one on the first try! I relaxed a little bit and stared out at the ocean waiting for our boat to come back in. Bill was the first person that I went scuba diving with after I was certified. He’s got this Texas’esque accent that he has never lost while living in Maui for 500 years and it’s down right adorable. I could hear his voice in my head the last time I went diving…”Have fun and be safe!” “check your depth sweetheart!” “if you get scared, look at me Darlin, it will be fine.” So when we got on the boat and started getting ready to go in and he started talking I began to feel better. Once I got all my gear on and went off the side of the boat backwards I was fine. All that anxiety for nothing…I was comfortable.
    Bill took us out to the reef he built. It’s compiled of a bunch of stuff he collected when cleaning up the ocean. He wrote out the words ALOHA and new coral is growing on it and to be honest, when you come down to about 60 feet and you’re hovering above it, it’s breathtaking.
    Hidden in a coral shelf was a white tipped shark. We came in close and I sat on the bottom of the ocean (about 90 feet) and watched and waited. He came out slowly and was arm distance away.
    Holy hell, I love my life!

    After our morning dive we came home and I slept like the dead while Lester hosed off all our gear and watched TV for a bit. Note to self: when taking Tylenol from a friend to rid yourself of a headache…make sure it doesn’t say PM after it, and be sure if you do still take it, only take ONE and not TWO.

    We found a great taco shop on suggestion from one of the guys at the dive company and next door was a tattoo shop. Just walking in made me nervous. Lester had designed the tattoo he’s getting while he’s here and I took one of his designs for myself. I’m not a tattoo person, but I did make a deal with him. If he went skydiving, I would get a tattoo. I had weaseled my way out of my end of the bargain, but when we decided to come to Maui I told him that I would get it while I was here.
    I showed the artist the tattoo that I want and he made a print out of it so I can wear it around for a day to see if it’s where I want it to be. Just him prepping the area for the stencil made me sick to my stomach. After it went on it looked HUGE and I began to regret even putting the stencil on! As I walked around and began to look at it on my skin, I decided it’s not as big as I originally thought and I do like it a lot. It’s a tattoo that I have been staring at for 2 years nearly every other night and I am very familiar with it. So on Thursday I will be getting my first tattoo…and I will probably either barf or pass out during the process.

    It’s been 2 hours and the sun still isn’t up. HURRY! I’m ready to start my day!!

  • Random and Odd

    Such a Life!!



    DSC_0362, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

    Yes, it has been forever since I have updated Random and Odd.
    For the last few weeks, things have been very busy and I haven’t been motivated to do much.

    2 weeks ago I moved out of the rental house and into an apartment. Marina asked me, “This must be just weird for you…you ok?” I told her after all the things that have happened in the last two years that this wasn’t even phasing me.
    The move went much easier than expected. I had signed up for the apartment a few hours after being laid off and I was approved after I showed proof that I wasn’t responsible for the excessive late payments on a car I no longer own. There was a solid month of being able to be fully packed up and ready to go on move day.
    I really like my apartment. I’m tucked into a neat, secluded corner that is surrounded by trees. When the wind is blowing really hard, it sounds like I have a waterfall on my patio. It’s cozy and I have already made it feel like home.

    The week after moving, Team Hiking with the Exes ran in the Merrell Mud Run in Folsom. There were a few things I wanted to accomplish this year and this wasn’t one of them…this was actually a Dan and Tabitha idea. Dan wanted to sign up for Tough Mudder which I believe is ran by the Marines and they have a part that you run through live wires and face getting electrocuted. This wasn’t my idea of ‘fun’. Tabitha wanted to sign up for the one that is in the middle of the desert and again…I vetoed joining that one. We settled for a local one.
    Lester came out to support me and take pictures (the one above) and I can’t tell you how much it meant to have him there. His smile when I crossed the finish line made it all worth it. The smile of course was probably there because he knew he wasn’t going to have to stand around waiting anymore and that we would be able to go home and get our nap.
    I don’t ask him to come out to any of the silly things I do and I offer to take him out running with us, but he ever so sweetly declines. I do believe that he will start hiking with me, if I hike and don’t run. (I’ll move him slowly into the running after a couple months)
    The Mud Run was pretty neat though. I have an issue with large crowds, but I had to just ‘Let Go’ and focus on getting there and doing what I had signed up for. When I got there and saw all the people and the mud pit I just had to laugh and say, “I really signed up and paid for this?” Tabitha was laughing because it wasn’t any different than a typical weekend mind fuck. I looked at her and said, “this isn’t my thing.” She just rolled her eyes and said, “You haven’t even done it yet!” It wouldn’t be a typical weekend mind fuck if I didn’t start complaining before we even got there.
    It actually wasn’t any different than our weekend runs on the trail except crawling under the cargo net and through the tunnel. During the winter the mud pit resembles an uphill stretch we climb when we are in training.
    I did have a Tabitha moment during the run when I got over the cargo net and saw a fellow runner stuck on the top, one leg over and frozen with fear. The next few minutes I stood there and coaxed him down. By coaxing I mean I was yelling at him military style telling him to MOVE IT MOVE IT MOVE IT and telling him that people were coming and that cargo net was going to get rocking. His best bet was to just fall off that damn thing than to just sit there. “You can do this! You got this far! Look at you and where you have been!!! PUT THAT LEG OVER NOW!!!” and he did. He had pushed through that mental spot and got to moving. I took off running after I saw he was okay. I heard his friend say a bit down the road “That’s the woman that got you over.” And him yell, “Thank you!” I waved and ran into the water to get the first part of mud out of my bra.
    All in all, it was a great day. I did what I set out to do, I started and I finished. The bonus part was helping a fellow runner out.

    This week has been finally settling into my little world and getting ready for our vacation. Yes, I said vacation!!!
    Lester and I have been talking about going scuba diving for a long time and we often thought of going to Monterey, but it’s too cold and not the diving we want to do.
    A couple weeks ago a bit of time opened up for both of us to drop everything and go scuba diving, so we booked it and have been counting the days.
    We went to the scuba store and got some essentials. Got our suitcase in order for all our gear and tonight I will be packing up my clothes. I have 3 pairs of shorts, a drawer full of tank tops and 2 pairs of flip flops. I’m going to also throw my trail shoes in there in hopes that when we finally come up for air that we can get a couple short hikes in. I’ll be happy if all we do is scuba dive, but since I have been to Maui two other times and did nothing other than scuba diving I would love to see something else on the island. I can’t wait to get back into to the water and see that magical world.

    Okay, time to unpack another box.

    Alooooooooooo-ha!