Random and Odd

Pop.

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Last weekend we had our first Twilight Trail Adventure Race in Cool, Ca.  As we weaved our way to the starting line, Whitney informs me that this is her first official race.
I felt like such an asshole.  It was like I was this guy with my hand up a girl’s dress and she informs me she has never had anyone get this far before, but she trusted me.  I guess the starting line was the raging hard on and I felt like a total prick because I knew that this was going to hurt like hell and  she may never want to have sex with me again…I mean run another 5k in her life.
Her husband ran with her for a bit while I tried to figure out what route to take.  I decided that it was me that got her onto the couch and plowed her with drinks, I need to be the one that holds her hand when she wants to claw out my eyeballs.
“Go ahead and catch up with Lester!” I yelled back to her husband as I slowed my pace.
“You’ll stick with her?” he asked and I assured him that I would. I would stay the night, snuggle and buy her breakfast in the morning too.

The run was dustier than I expected it and when my watched chimed “one mile”, I sing songed back to Whitney that we had a mile under our belt.  “THAT’S ALL!?”   Okay, yes, it was just the tip and the worse was probably yet to come, but a mile is a good portion to have under your belt.
We hit the hills of the race and I had long since lost my focus and was too worried if Whitney had decided to pull up her panties and head for the door.  “How you doing?” I probably asked more than necessary.  “I’m good.”  She was a trooper for sure.  As we hit the second set of hills I felt like a douche. “I need to stop.”  I pulled over to the side and let her take a minute to take a drink and try to figure out if she was going to kill me or just get a restraining order against me.  We did this a bunch on the way up the hills.  As we hit the downhill I figured we would make up some lost time, but it was pretty dark out and her shoes weren’t trail worthy.
I cringed at the two mile mark and didn’t want to tell her, but she asked soon after and I think it gave her some peace of mind.  We kept a slow trot until the cool air of the trees was gone and the hot air from the meadow was rising.  The aid station snuck up on me and she was so happy.
“I’ve been looking for you!” she squealed at the guys with the water.  I knew what I was in for and I had worn my water bladder and I decided the next time I would let everyone know what they were up against in order to not feel like a heartless prick again.

As we got closer to the finish line, I asked her “ignore the pain in your side and just run through it until we cross the finish line, we are almost there.”

She did.  I was so proud of her.

I have a feeling she won’t be calling me in the morning.