working/not working

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier…I put them in the same
room and let them fight it out. — Steven Wright

In order to be able to advance to the next level of crazy, I have to take the classes, which are taught by Dr. Lousy. I FINALLY went out and got the book about ‘managing stress and anxiety’. After the second chapter I realized that this is the book that Dr. Lousy bought to base his expertise on. It was all about IBS. I guess that everyone that has anxiety and panic attacks have no control over their poop. Perhaps I am the exception, I wouldn’t go as far as saying I am the poop-master…but I can control my shit.

Days before I got the book, I started reading a book I started to read a million years ago and then forgot to finish it. It’s called, “The Gift of Fear” by Gavin De Becker.
I’m slamming through this book because I can so relate to what he’s talking about. It’s that instinct of fear that we are all gifted with and how we suppress that instinct in order to not seem ‘rude’.
Now, for me, I have an abundance of this ‘gift’ because I have fear ALL.THE.TIME. So, as I am reading this book, I’m realizing how far my ‘fight or flight’ response is on 24/7 and it doesn’t ALWAYS have to be on. You have to be aware and listen to your body when it is telling you something though. That is what will save our lives.

I picked up this new book that Dr. Lousy requires us to have for the class. It is telling me the exact opposite. I need to shut down those instincts and fears. I need to tell myself that the guy that is wearing the heavy coat in the middle of summer isn’t packing a huge shot gun under that thing. I need to think that everything is going to be A-OK. Honkey-Dorey.

Part of the ‘homework’ is writing down the anxiety you experienced and at the end of the chapter are questions about the chapter. They are true or false. I’m either right or wrong. Test anxiety…here I come.

How do you fail an anxiety attack class? I’m sure I will find out.

Probably reading “The Gift of Fear” in the waiting room filled with other people with anxiety and panic will seriously get me crazy-people detention.

Ohhhhh yea. I am such a rebel.