word ta ya mutha.

All morning officially sucked.  It’s official. I called the office of Suck McSucky and gave them my information on my morning and they certified it as ‘sucked’.  It was ‘royally’ sucky, but it sucked enough to get a certificate and a reason to blog about it.

My van, Bertie, has been making a funny noise when I run the air.  There is nothing more I hate than taking my car into the shop, ESPECIALLY if there is a “Warranty” involved.  It doesn’t matter what warranty I get. I can pay 4 times the car worth for a warranty and the ONE thing that is wrong with my car is the ONE thing that wasn’t covered.

I headed over to the rental car company.  Jeremiah begins the scream to end all screams when the nice lady begins describing the cars they have.
“I just need one with a CD player.”
Normally, I could care less if I have music or not, but since I watch Jeremiah during the day, the need for a CD player is essential.  See, the boy doesn’t like ‘bye-bye’.  He screams.  We could install a disco ball and play hip hop with hired dancers to entertain him while in the car and it wouldn’t work. He will scream the scream.
Shaun made him a CD and I can be out for a little over an hour before he freaks out.  It starts with the theme to Kipper the Dog and that soothes him.  You don’t DARE put him in a car without that CD in the player.

ONE HOUR LATER.

“Okay, we have a car with a CD player for you.”  At this point I have seen 20 people come in and complain about SOMETHING with a car or an overcharge that was added to their credit card.  I’m starting to freak out a little bit because they have my credit card number on file and charged me TWO HUNDRED dollars (I don’t have) for a deposit.

I get out to the car and it’s a Tahoe. I had to triple upgrade to get THIS?
“You couldn’t get me a Dodge Neon with a CD player. I’m pretty sure they are standard.”  The woman tried to sell me on this “car” because it was more roomy.    All the while the car is running and I can HEAR the gas being sucked from it.
Then after all the waiting and panicking,  THE CAR SEAT WON’T GO INTO IT.  Nope. It has no locking system and the seatbelt doesn’t have a safety clip to secure it.

“NO! I WILL NOT LOCK PUT MY CHILD IN THIS CAR! IT IS NOT SAFE!” The woman realizes that I have just about had enough of the BS and is about tired of hearing the scream to end all screaming from the child.

I tell them I want a car that is on THE LOT and that they don’t have to drive to another lot to go get. I want a car that has the latching system. I want a DAMN CD PLAYER!
You’ll never guess what this woman is driving.  A friggin’ 07 Cadillac.  I feel like P-Diddy’s girlfriend when I’m driving it.

Shaun said he’s going to take pictures. I think I need to run out and get a set of those gold teeth and big clock for my neck.
WORD?