You all SUCK!

Get it yet? okay, well let me keep going with the post and you can see how I tied all this shit in together.
I need a new vacuum cleaner. I have been saying it for years and I am finally caving in and buying one.
I need your help.

What type of vacuum do you have?
Do you love it?
What do you not like about it?
Is it loud?
Is it heavy?
If you could get a new vacuum cleaner * what kind would you get?

*Note: Dyson users, just shut up because I can’t afford it so don’t be telling me how much you love your sucker. Besides, Pissy is dead to me for subjecting her child to the doodlebobs.

I’m buying a sucker THIS WEEK, so help a blogger out.  Spread the word on your blog if you have to. Take polls, do door to door questioning…i don’t care, but I need to know this information.  The last time I bought a vacuum cleaner was 13 years ago.
The only thing: I don’t want no cheap sounding, wwwwwwwwwwwhhhhhhhirrrrrlllllllllllllllly kind, you know the one that is SUPER LOUD to make up for it’s small penis sucking power.   I just want one that Isn’t all cheap feeling. I want it to suck the living hell out of my carpet.  I want it to work so well my carpet actually loses color after i’m done.

Am I asking to much? Give up the doodlebobs, tell me my boobs look great and do a good suck job.

*click here to see why this picture relates to the post, if you don’t already get it.