my face was pulled off…

My sister, Dashababy, decided I needed a facial before my wedding. I’ve never had my eyebrows plucked out of my head and it proved to be almost as painful as the birth of my first child. I had also never had a facial. In fact, i’m telling the whole internet right now that I don’t really wash my face. I get in the shower, wash my hair, brush my teeth, inspect for boob hair, use my Bath and Body Works smell good stuff…get out. I wear make up and I never wash it off before I go to bed. I get up looking like Gene Simmons after an all nighter.

The facial was actually a ‘facial peel’. I have heard of people having this done, but those people live in Hollywood and have people who know people. I don’t know people. MY SISTER KNOWS SOME PEOPLE, and she hooked her little sister up with a facial peel.

“So, what does it do?” I ask on the ride over to the people she knows.
“It takes off about 8 layers of skin.”
I think about this for a moment. I wait for her laughter. Nothing.
“Kath, will I have to get another tan? I mean, will it like peel my tan off my face?”
“Possibly. You shouldn’t be in the sun for 24 hours afterward though.”

I wasn’t scared too much, because have you seen my sister? She’s Hawt and she gets these ever so often.
The woman that does her facials was a sweetheart. She told me the dark circles under my eyes might be from eating carbs and I didn’t correct her and tell her it’s because I stay up until 4 am watching episodes of Twilight Zone. As punishment for never washing my face with stuff that would protect me from the evils of life…she pulled my face off.
She kept asking me, ‘tingling yet?’…I would say, ‘noooo’. About 3 minutes into it, I could feel that she had put sand on my face with the stuff she was rubbing in there. She told me, ‘That is your skin’.

After the whole thing was over I was hoping to look in the mirror and see the milky white face of Nicole Kidman staring back at me, but it was just me. I was all shiney.
The next day, my face was still shiny and I have been using the stuff my sister has called, “GOLD IN A LITTLE SAMPLE PACKET….USE IT SPARINGLY”.

Today we went out to take pictures of whatever we found and Shaun thought I looked funny all hunched over taking a picture of a leaf that was floating in puddle. I heard the sound of his crunching feet coming towards me and I looked up. He caught the picture I put above. I like this picture because I look even! I mean…I glow without skin on my face!!

Thank you, Sisser Ween! I love you so very much!