I wrote this whole post on ‘weight’ and realized I have a huge problem writing about weight.
When I was on this mailing list a million years ago, the women spoke of eating disorders and I listened very closely because I didn’t want my daughters to have that problem.
One of the many things they told me was to not obsess about your weight in front of your children. Don’t let your weight run your life in front of your children.
This has been pretty easy. Even when I did diet, I didn’t let it effect the girls…all they heard was ‘mommy is getting healthier.’
My kids have a normal outlook on what they look like, what they eat and what people say about them. This weekend Kara overhead a woman saying she looked anorexic. She laughed at the lady and made some stupid Kara comment. Later she did ask what size I was when I was her age. I tried to explain that I was 5’7 when I was her age. I don’t think she understood the whole concept. She’s in 7th grade and 13 years old and a size 0. I was in 7th grade and 13 years old and a size 7. She now thinks that there might be something wrong. It doesn’t matter how much I tried to protect her from a bad body image, some woman walking past her at a street faire has her questioning herself.
This question keeps popping into my head, “When do you feel most beautiful?” I keep asking myself this question without putting my weight as a factor. When do I REALLY feel beautiful?
How about you? When do YOU feel truly beautiful?
61 responses to “”
I feel most beautiful in that moment between darkness and sickness when someone asks how I’m doing. In the moment where I can laugh off and dismiss my cancer, and still glow at my motherhood. When I feel like I can conquer the world.
when Jen and T look at me…yeah like that…when they walk by and run their fingers along my arm as they pass me…when we are sleeping, and they turn and curl around me…when they tell me to lay down so they can watch Trout…
when Pman walks up to me and says “i love you ama”…
theres more, but thats a start…
peace…
I feel most beautiful at 5:30 in the morning, when my hair’s a mess and there’s dried drool on the side of my face because I couldn’t breathe through my nose at night. Because regardless of how I look, the love of my life turns off his alarm, kisses my nose and says, “I love you, Baby” before slipping out of bed.
When I was in 7th grade and 12 years old, I was a size 11 and 5’9″ tall. Now, I’m 5’10” tall and a size 10.
But in between, I was as low as a 6 because I was SURE I could look like a supermodel (I had the height, after all!) if I really tried.
In college I gained all the weight back and then some. Now I’ve lost some of it. I’m still not happy with the way I look, but I’m trying not to let it control my life.
I have yet to experience that..
I was diagnosed with rheumatic fever in the summer of my 9th birthday. The first 10 days in the hospital was in what was then called Watch Care. The next 16 days were on a regular hospital floor.
The rest of the summer was on the couch in the living room watching a very bad black and white tv with ‘rabbit ears’, and reading anything that came my way (the Bookmobile was wonderful!) and learning to crochet using a pattern.
My dad or my uncle carried me upstairs to the bathroom, and my mom had to help with my shower because I was so weak.
4th grade first semester was still on the couch with a tutor and my mom helping with schoolwork, and my younger sister doing messenger service to the school building.
Once I was able to go to the school building myself, I did not take gym class ever again, at any grade level. All the medical advisors were afraid of the strain it might put on my heart. Someone yelling “no pain, no gain” would not help my recovery.
This was sometimes envied by other girls, who hated to be so energetic and unladylike.
I had to go along with my classmates, but sat on the bench. The gym teacher often had me be a scorekeeper, which is how I got better at Math.
When I was 16, the doctor gave permission for me to carry an after-school paper route. He said I had to pace myself, rest often, carry only a few papers in my sack at any one time.
About 3 months into my duties, the maps for routes were changed around, and I had to climb a hill with the last 25 papers in my sack.
There was no way I was going to leave half of them at the bottom of the hill and carry just a few and make more than one trip.
It took three weeks before I could walk up that hill carrying all 25 without stopping once or twice to catch my breath. I kept checking my pulse to make sure it wasn’t getting too fast.
The day I walked up the hill without breaking stride and with all the needed papers in my sack was the day I knew I was a champion. I can’t remember what I weighed at the time. I just knew I was strong enough to overcome anything, no matter what anyone else told me.
The closest I ever came to recognizing that feeling was years later when I watched the movie _ROCKY_ and he jogged up the steps of the huge building and did the happy dance once he got to the top.
These days, I am overweight. My doctor says so, my husband says so, and yesterday a 4-year-old child announced it for one and all to hear.
Too many hours of sitting in front of the computer screen, and being able to drive a car anytime and anywhere I want to go.
Maybe having gasoline at $2.99 a gallon will be incentive enough for me to get going on my bicycle whenever possible.
I won’t give up reading Random and Odd, tho ;)
I feel most beautiful when my son or daughter tells me, “Mom, I love your smile. You’re so beautiful.” or when my husband sees me when I wake up in the morning when my hair’s all crazy and I have no makeup on and he says, “I love it when you look like this”. I tell him he needs glasses and walk off but “inside” I’m smiling. And I’ve been fat (205lbs when Bunny was born) and skinny and he’s NEVER made a comment about my weight. Also, right after I gave birth to both of my kids and I was lying there in the hospital bed looking “crazy” and he said I’d never looked more beautiful.
I guess it really IS in how other people perceive us unfortunately. Does everyone need that validation to feel beautiful? I’m not sure. I’ve never met anyone who didn’t. A by product of our society I guess. I think you’re a great mom and you’re doing just fine.
P.S. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL KRISTINE! Don’t ever let anyone tell you any different. You know what we say in the south? Beauty is in the eye of the BEERHOLDER;)
Wow Kristine, that’s so unfortunate that someone said that. People should just keep comments like that to themselves.
I was in a similar situation when growing up (to you) because I could squat 110 lbs when I was in grade 8. I have always been ‘robust’ and strong, but some people might see that as being ‘fat’. I do carry a little more fat than I should (who doesn’t??), but for the most part I don’t obsess.
My sister is also very strong, but for some reason she obsesses. Is it more difficult for teens these days? I don’t know. On some of the discussion forums that I’ve read in secret she discusses an “eating disorder”, how she doesn’t eat for days at a time. From what I know, she doesn’t have one, but I’ve been away from the family since 1996 so I don’t honestly know. She doesn’t eat much, but she does eat. Is it just an attention grab? I don’t know. But I am concerned.
Me? I feel most beautiful when I’ve had a week where I’ve been really active and eating well. The activity communicates with my body and says “thanks”. It certainly gives me a high.
I love my big bum that sticks out. I love my thick thighs. I wouldn’t have them any other way. Now I just need to continue on this fit kick (and eating better) and things will be A-OK.
I LIED.
I wish I didn’t have a bum or thighs when I go shopping because they don’t fit into anything.
Clothing manufacturers only make pant legs for people with little legs.
I think I feel most beautiful when a.) no one is looking b.) when someone else accepts me 100% and I feel comfortable, but most importantly c.) I feel most comfortable when I feel strong, I take care of myself and I’m doing everything I could possibly be doing to be healthy.
Nice post, lady ;)
I feel beautiful when I’m doing something I’m passionate about; when I look back at my accomplishments; when I liberate myself from wearing make-up and monitoring fashion; when I realize how lucky I am to be able to walk, talk, think and love; when I realize I can do anything I put my mind to; when I smile; when I laugh; when I don’t let marketing gurus tell me when and why I should feel beautiful…
Im overweight by about 40kgs. I hate it and am trying to lose it wit healthier eating and less chocolate, but I serioulsly lack willpower (anyone who can tell me how to get willpower Id love to hear from ya)
But each day when my hubby kisses me, hugs me and touches me…I know he loves me.
My neice text msgs me now with Love you.
Its a great feeling.
My shallow answer to this – is when I come out of the hairstylist after getting my hair colored and blow dried.
I feel beautiful when Kim looks at me in this way that’s hard to describe.
Certainly I wish I was thinner, but I’m pretty much OK with myself. Mostly I wish I was thinner so my face didn’t look so chubby. But it does keep the wrinkles to a minimum ;)
Kara, and all your kids for that matter, look healthy to me. She does not look anorexic in any way. Everyones different. My girls were/are 5’8″ in 6th grade and wear size 10/11 but they’re healthy and play sports and that’s what matters.
Kara is a beautiful girl. Never has the adjective (?) “anorexic” ever crossed my mind when seeing her pictures. She looks perfect and healthy to me. Obviously that woman who said that is feeling bad about herself, it’s unfortunate that she had to pass her bad day onto another human being. What a bitch!
First of all: You are truly beautiful, Kristine!
Second, I feel beautiful when I´m organized and I can control my time and deal with everything in a whole: work, engagement, parents, friends, PhD. It´s terrible to me not to have time for the things I put as priority in my life. I hate feeling I´m behind; I hate to be seen as someone that can´t deal with the ordinary things or facts in life. And that´s something really tiring sometimes…
My grandmother used to say beauty is where our heart can travel deeply and we can find the best of us, the best inside, our inner power. When we find ourselves we become really beautiful in all senses :)
This is SO hard. I’m overweight, but trying to improve (not trying hard, baby steps ya know) and try not to let her see it. A couple weeks ago she informed me she didn’t want to drink her milk because she didn’t want to grow up to be *big* and strong, she wants to be skinny.
She’s five. If this is five, how do I handle 15?
Gosh… I haven’t felt beautiful in a long time.
I’m always feeling sorry for myself on that front. I have decided however that this summer is the “summer of self-love” but not in a pervy way :)
I’m taking classes, reading my book, working on getting healthy and shedding a couple hundred pounds of unsightly flesh. I’m also reading laws of attraction and meditating. I’m going to remind myself that I am beautiful, that I do deserve love and revel in the fact that I’m not living in a hostile environment anymore.
You are beautiful. Inside and OUT!
And I am not being fucking cheesy. You truly are.
I feel beautiful when I have a good hair day.
Or when I get something new to wear….
I don’t need to feel beautiful much, just feeling comforatable with myself is good enough for me.
Now maybe if I lost 50 pounds..I would feel better.
;)
Weight is a tough issue for me, too. This has been my “fat decade”….got divorced, quit smoking and gained weight. Coming out of it now, and the weight is leaving. My daughter is bulemic, though, and it pisses me off. I’m sad that the only way she feels she can control her weight is by purging, and
Weight is a tough issue for me, too. This has been my “fat decade”….got divorced, quit smoking and gained weight. Coming out of it now, and the weight is leaving. My daughter is bulemic, though, and it pisses me off. I’m sad that the only way she feels she can control her weight is by purging, and I hope she learns better by seeing me control my weight in a healthy way again.
Still working on beautiful; I’m pretty satisfied, though.
At 13 I was a tall gangly string been with big feet, but I was involved in sports. I’ve always had a complex about how when I stopped sports I gained a lot of weight and other womanly vices. Your daughter is probably really active and her body is slowly catching up and all you can do is reassure her about that.
It’s taken a long time, but I feel most beautiful when I’m wearing clothes that show off my very female curves and heals that exsentuate my long legs. It makes me feel like everyone is admiring my femininity ;)
I feel beautiful at night – when we are just ready to fall asleep and Mr. Incredible will roll over and hug me and tells me he loves me…
I’m sorry some insestive woman said that to Kara – from the pics I’ve seen the girls are beautiful…
I can relate to Kara. I was tiny. I was called anorexic. I wished I had curves and an ass. I honestly didn’t grow into my body – at least in my opinion – until my early 20s. Only now am I content with what I’ve got, and that is an incredible thing.
I don’t really have any good advice for her, but I will say that I took comfort in the fact that I was the only one among my friends who could eat as many donuts as I damn well pleased.
I feel beautiful when I’ve had a good hard workout.
I feel beautiful when my daughter hugs me and snugs up with me. When she rubs my head and tells me my hair is growing back.
I feel beautiful when my sweet boyfriend tells me that I’m beautiful when I’m bald, sick, and hurting. He reminds me that this is temporary. And that he thinks I’m really sexy.
Strangers can say the dumbest things sometimes. ARGH!
Kudos to you for raising your kids to be so healthy about their body image. I’m sure that is very hard. I obsess about my weight nearly all the time.
As to when I feel beautiful, it’s usually when my hair is perfectly styled, the make-up is applied like a pro and I’m wearing something that makes me look less like myself and more like skinny hot chick. But then, I’ll be all grubbed out in sweats, and my boyfriend will tell me I’m beautiful. So I just take his word for it.
All your girls are beautiful, just like their mom. So the next time you need to feel that reassurance that you are beautiful, go take a look at them. Sometimes it’s easier to see it that way.
My thirteen and fourteen year olds are both a size 0. They have completely different body styles and my oldest often gets the anorexia comments. She is very small boned yet completely healthy. I know it hurts as much as someone saying she is overweight. I have had long discussions with them on these types of things, long before they were even old enough to be concerned about it, in hopes that when the issue comes up, it will be easier. It might also help that I am overweight and still happy to be me. :)
I feel beautiful when I help others. I feel beautiful when I look at my stretch marks and all they represent. I feel beautiful when my husband wants to shag me even though there is speghetti down the front of my lime green shirt and holes in my pink polka dot jammie pants and I gotta side pony going on. I feel beautiful when I am driving down the street and its a sunny day and my favorite song is on the radio.
And I don’t mean on the outside because I could care less about that. I mean on the inside…ya know the part that REALLY counts.
I ate like a horse when I was a kid (and still do as an adult but with much more caution). I was often asked if I had an eating disorder. 15-20 years ago it wasn’t as common a thing for girls to be aware of. I usually just laughed and said, “yeah right you should see what I eat!” I think you are bringing your daughters up with a healthy perspective on body image and self esteem. Life confuses us sometimes, a comment someone makes, an image we see, but if the core of our beliefs, (and your daughters) is strong as I know you have instilled in them. It will be OK.
She might be asking questions but HECK she is TALKING to you! Revel in the joy of that! OK enough unsolicited advice from someone with no kids!
To answer YOUR questions…I feel most beautiful on two (completely unrelated occassions). (1) When I am comfortable, both in my own skin, in my mind, in my life and in my comfy clothes. I don’t need to have them all align each one can make me feel beautiful. (2) Is a bit more superficial. I feel beautiful when I have a good hair day. (Sometimes its the littler things that make a person feel beautiful.
I feel beautiful when I have a really great outfit on, my hair is done, and I am actually wearing makeup!
I’m at my glowing best when I’m with a cheap 2-bit whore in a Run down $29.99 per night motel. Works for me.
Dr H.O. Potamus
Every Day
I must have a strange sense of when I feel most beautiful.. But picture this if you can. Combat boots, sweat dripping from my brow, an OH so flattering bullet proof vest and blood all over my hands, shirt and pants. Straddling a 6 year old girl doing CPR on a cot being RAN into the E.R. after a moter vehicle collision. An hour and a half later seeing a look of pure joy and relief on the faces of her parents when they are told she is stable and will be ok. Knowing I had something to do with that is what makes me feel beautiful..
Boy, I wish I could tell your daughter some things. But even if I could, I know it wouldn’t do any good. She’s not the one with the problem. The woman who would say such a thing is the one with the problem.
I’m a short one, 5 feet even. I wore children’s clothes all through high school and I weighed 86 lbs my freshman year of college. I also was pretty hefty on top if you know what I mean. I have hips and an hourglass figure.
My stepfather used to tell me I was fat and then he used to joke how he didn’t understand how I could keep my balance and just not tip over. I believed him that I was fat. I’ve spent years, decades sabotaging my body. Keeping myself “fat” (fat for me anyway)so as to not to draw attention to myself.
If I could go back and change things, I would hope that I could have seen my reflection for what it was and not let someone else tell me what my eyes should have been able to see was a lie.
I feel truly beautiful now that I know who I am, now that I know that no one can tell me anything that will sway my beliefs in myself.
Kara, looks healthy to me. Stupid woman.
This is probably going to sound ridiculous, but I’ve never felt beautiful. I’ve always moved forward with the understanding that I don’t have the physical characteristics to be beautiful. The only time it is an issue is when I’m sad/depressed/feeling vulnerable. Like GFI, I feel my best when I am strong, in control, and about 10 lbs. lighter than I am now.
Kristine, I find your motherhood and loving the most beautiful.
I feel beautiful when I dance. All by myself.
When my boyfriend twirls my hair. When he tells me I am beautiful. When he hugs me at the end of the day and breathes me in.
When my nieces twirl my hair, or sit on my lap and play with my eaarings or when they hold my face with both hands and stare into my eyes, smiling.
I feel beautiful when I see things that are beautiful.
Sometimes I feel beautiful just because my hair looks great, or if I feel great in the clothes I am wearing.
I don’t usually comment but this struck a cord with me… I was anorexic in HS and into college when I was finally hospitalized at 78 lbs (I’m 5feet tall just for reference)
I could just KILL women like the one Kara encountered. After I was a healthy 93 lbs (still on the low end but after all I’d been through this was amazing) for over a year women still asked me if I had eaten that day, etc… people I didn’t know . I was working retail at the time and perfect strangers would ask if I’d eaten that morning/afternoon etc… and then proceed to tell me I was too thin… it is not a strangers business! and I was taught through therapy on how to assess my own view of thin… sometimes I wanted to tell these ladies that if they thought this was thin they should’ve seen me at my lowest … ARG!
sorry to go on so long but people like that piss me off!!! just be sure Kara knows how many people love her… and if for any reason she has body image issues in the future let her know you are there for her. I was skinny my whole life and branded as the little girl – going through puberty and “fulling out” was scary for me… so many people don’t realize it’s hard on the little people too.
All my love to you and Kara – and the family – I love your site.
Currently I feel most beautiful when I take care of myself. Dress nice, do my hair and make-up, and wear heels. I feel beautiful when my fiancé holds me close and kisses my forehead. And for the first time in my life I feel beautiful when I look in the mirror. It’s quite the achievement and I hope I can keep that with me always.
Thanks for reading my short novel. Alexis
Kara, and all your girls, are beautiful. This post has me crying because beautiful is not a word I would use to describe how I ever feel. Healthy, maybe. Attractive, sometimes. Accomplished, definately. But beautiful? No. I know that no matter how much weight I lose I will never really feel beautiful. That is reserved for blondes with no stretch marks all over their bodies who are much higher maintenance than I’ll ever be. My husband tells me I am sometimes but I just don’t believe him. The closest I come is maybe with a new haircut, great outfit, new jewelry, that kind of thing.
It’s funny how things stick in your head. One of the most impactful statements ever made to me was in college by a guy I considered to be a total stud who was a friend. I was telling him how I had met Mike (my now husband) and how much I liked him. I said “He thinks I’m beautiful!” and Brian replied “Well you ARE very good looking!” Funny how that meant more to me than so many other conversations in my life. Sad, really.
I was always the thinnest girl in school and did get accused of being anorexic. Now, I am a size 15-16, 5’10 and prolly the largest girl in Asia…and it sucks.
When do I feel beautiful? When my hair falls the way I want it to. When Graeme looks at me in a way that I know I am the only girl he loves. When my kids at school make an off-the-cuff compliment. When make-up-less and in my comfy clothes.
I am trying more and more to feel beautiful everyday, because I am. We all are. We should feel it and revel in it.
I don’t believe I’ve ever felt beautiful (or the male equivalent) in my life.
I’ve felt loved. I’ve felt valued. I’ve felt sexy. I’ve felt like I’ve made people feel better. I’ve felt content, happy, smart, funny … all those things.
But I’ve never felt beautiful/good-looking/handsome, and I don’t know that I ever will. It’s just not a language I speak to myself.
i have a weight post that’s been sitting in my drafts for weeks. I just can’t seem to get it to say what I want it to say. Most people woudl look at me and think I am the ideal. yeah, I’m small, have always been small, but what people don’t realize is that even the smaller people have weight issues.
Now for he question….when do i feel beautiful? i don’t know….
Tell Kara that our daughter, who’s now 24, has been a size zero ever since she moved out of litle girl clothes (which she could still really wear if she wanted to). She eats 3-5 meals a day and hates to exercise. People, including her wacky mother-in-law, accuse her of being anorexic all the time. It’s just the way her body is. The only problem Jen has is finding clothes that fit her well, everything is too big.
When I’m wearing something I FEEL good in and the confidence shows.
When Heath looks at me with those adoring eyes.
When I’m holding my babies in my arms late at night… in jammies, hair pulled up, makeup smeared or gone, and I realize how beautiful life is, they are, and it shines through me.
I sit here reading this post, and reading all the comments, and I am having a really hard time thinking when I feel most beautiful. Where did my self-esteem, my self-confidence go? I am forever too tall, too skinny for people’s taste (and why is it that anyone feels free to comment on skinny people’s weight?? Do we ever say, “Wow. You really are fat?”), too 4-eyed, too stringy-haired. Or am I? It’s amazing what the female mind will do to itself.
I feel most beautiful when I leave the gym. My body has gotten itself through a day of work and also a workout and survived!
Kristine, thanks for making us think about this, because we are the first ones that have to realize our own beauty and we all have it! (ooh–very you-go-girl!)
I haven’t really felt beautiful in a loooong time. The last time I felt beautiful in the body I’m in NOW was about 6 months ago, during my birthday. My then-boyfriend and I were, um, intimate, and even though I was very selfconscious about my body, he still would say “let me enjoy you, you’re beautiful the way you are” and every time he saw me in person, he’d look me in the eyes and tell me I’m beautiful and when I said I wasn’t, he said “that’s what I see”.
The last time before that would have to have been in college, I wasn’t skinny, but I wasn’t as big as I am now. I am 5 ft 1, and I weighed 135 pounds, size 10/12, but I was happy with how I looked, was on dance team at the college, that was actually right before I started feeling self-conscious, because I was told at my weight/height I needed to lose at least 15 pounds, even though I was good enough as a dance team member to make captain, I was never as insecure about my body as I was after my last year in college, and of course since then I stopped dance team after graduation and the weight slowly came on, kid…you know the drill.
Its been a long time since I was happy with my weight. Its the only thing about my I truly hate. That and the fact that I’m very shy, lol.
I haven’t really felt beautiful in a loooong time. The last time I felt beautiful in the body I’m in NOW was about 6 months ago, during my birthday. My then-boyfriend and I were, um, intimate, and even though I was very selfconscious about my body, he still would say “let me enjoy you, you’re beautiful the way you are” and every time he saw me in person, he’d look me in the eyes and tell me I’m beautiful and when I said I wasn’t, he said “that’s what I see”.
The last time before that would have to have been in college, I wasn’t skinny, but I wasn’t as big as I am now. I am 5 ft 1, and I weighed 135 pounds, size 10/12, but I was happy with how I looked, was on dance team at the college, that was actually right before I started feeling self-conscious, because I was told at my weight/height I needed to lose at least 15 pounds, even though I was good enough as a dance team member to make captain, I was never as insecure about my body as I was after my last year in college, and of course since then I stopped dance team after graduation and the weight slowly came on, kid…you know the drill.
Its been a long time since I was happy with my weight. Its the only thing about my I truly hate. That and the fact that I’m very shy, lol.
I thought about this for a while and then came back to comment. I’m overweight…by a lot. So, at first when I read the question, I was like..”nope not answering. I never feel beautiful.” But then I thought about it and that’s not true. I feel beautiful when I’m having a good hair day. Or when I have a cute new outfit/shoes on. And especially when my husband tells me I look cute. Or just snuggles up to me for no reason. So, yeah. I feel beautiful a lot more than I realized. Thanks for the good question, Kristine.
For many many years I have only felt beautiful when I’ve gotten attention from males.
Sad really. That I needed other people to validate my beauty.
Now I feel the most beautiful when I’m exercising.
Not that it happens very much anymore, but it always makes me feel so good about my body.
And I feel beautiful now when I’m dancing around the room with my kids.
You are truly a beautiful woman Kristine!
I feel most beautiful on the days I don’t obsess over my appearance. Instead, I am productive, energetic and just ME!
I hate people. Why wouldl someone make such a remark to a teenager? There is just no call for that.
I feel beautiful when my husband holds me. He has an amazing way of making me feel that way.
Mostly, I just feel fat.
Like someone else, I feel beautiful when I feel strong. When I made it through surgery, when I moved out on my own, when I made it through a robbery, when I ran a 10K. When I stand up tall (all 5’5 of me) and walk with confidence and take my space in the world.
When I look into his eyes. I know that I am.
Obsiously that woman was a side show at the street fiare.
I think your daughter’s are all smart, beautiful and healthy girls, and unfortunately we are all prone at any age, the the cruel way of the world.
I feel most beautiful when I am dreaming…
when I look back at pictures from before I had Baby D and I actually WAS beautiful. alright – that and when my husband proclaims it, but other than that, I’m pretty sure I’m ugly now and will be forever.
You might also want to explain to Kara that a size 7 back then is like a size 2 now!!!! I SWEAR!!!!!! Or just say, “about your size.”
I think the only times I have ever truly felt beautiful was when I was pregnant with my kids. Other than that, I would have so say “never”. How sad and pathetic is that?
GREAT POST.
I do not feel beautiful.
I feel that I should work on it more to be a better example for my daughter. She is so impressed when I lose weight, fluff my hair, etc.
I am a poor, poor role model for her.
Speckledpup-I’m sure you’re daughter looks at you and thinks you’re beautiful even in your worst day. Because you are her momma. Plain and simple..all mothers are beautiful.
Now I feel most beautiful when I’m with my kids. I love that happy feeling.
I hope if someone ever says that to my girls in my presence (who, given their genes, are likely to be size zeros at age 13 as well) that I will gather my wits in time to tell them off. I was tiny and small-chested in high school, but I liked my figure. It was my face I hated. I figured it must be ugly since I rarely had a boyfriend (the terrible case of acne didn’t help matters).
These days, I sometimes feel attractive, but rarely beautiful. The times I have felt most beautiful are the first hour after giving birth to each of my girls. I felt so strong, so powerful, so womanly.
I’m still pretty shallow about wanting to look right. My tiny figure is gone. Breastfeeding has given me a huge bust, one I’m not thrilled about, since my waist is also thicker, which means big bust makes me just look FAT. Ugh.
never beautiful, but pretty fucking suave in a tux. ;)
Interesting post, Kristine. Kara and my 14-year-old step-daughter are the same size, with completely different perspectives on their weight. My girl thinks she’s fat because her former-model mother told her so. Example: “God, you’re such a fat ass since you got back from vacation!” Kara is so, so, so pretty. I have never once seen a picture where she looks the least bit anorexic. When I see photos of your kids, I always think, “adorable” and “happy”. I think you’re an excellent mother. When do I feel most beautiful? When my nine year old takes my face in her hands at bedtime and says, “You’re so pretty, Mama!”
I feel beautiful when I am breastfeeding, when I am doing a presentation that I am very prepared for, when I am laughing, when I curl my hair, when someone says thank you to me, and immediatly after making love- when my skin and face are flushed pink form the action.
Sasha, post 20919…, the figure you were describing as having in high school was called a “Pocket Venus” in the Victorian age. Yes, I am a font of useless information…..,