Four Days

This is my birthday week!

Usually at the beginning of March you start hearing “It’s my BirFday Month!” chanted, sang & thrown slyly into a conversation.

I haven’t really done that this year. I don’t know why. I like thirty four. 34 is WAY better than 24. This means I am one year from 35 which means i’m 5 years away from 40. THAT is a good thing! You might ask, “Why is she excited about being 40?”
HELLO??? Have you not seen my mom and sister?
Our genes show that the older you get, the more smokin’ hot you get! We went to Vegas when Kathy turned 40 and I had to get a stun gun to keep the guys away from her.
It will be nice to be 40 and be walking down the street and have a guy almost hit a garbage can because he’s staring so hard at you.

Right now, at 34…I will get the occational contruction worker pull up next to me and give me the eye.
I then turn around and look in my MINI VAN at the FIVE PLUS children crammed into it and then look back at him like he’s on crack.
One day when the van was crammed full of older kids I got someone checkin’ me out and one of the kids noticed. I looked over and he was all kindsa googly eyed. I was SHOCKED! I think I had like 8 kids in the car at the time and this guy was pimpin’ the mini van!
“No pimpin’ the mini van! THAT IS WRONG!!! EWWWWWWWWWW!!!”
The kids just started laughing hysterically.
“I wouldn’t care if the guy was HOT, if he’s going to pick up on me while I am driving EIGHT kids around in an UGLY MINI VAN…he has no class or taste WHAT SO EVER! EWWW…no pimpin’ the mini van. ick.” So yes, bring on 40! I will then be able to drive a car that doesn’t require 12 airbags. >Have I mentioned it’s my birthday week? Yes, Friday is my birthday! THIRTY FOUR BABY!! Okay, that was a lame attempt at getting excited for my birthday, and I am very sorry for the all caps and lame ass use of ‘baby’ at the end of the sentence. Yes, I felt like a frat boy for 3 seconds. STUFF PORTRAIT FRIDAY is all about my birthday. Yes, I am getting selfish in my old age huh? BRING ME ICE CREAM! 1. Take a picture of something you own that you’re ‘gifting’ me with.
(you don’t really have to give it to me, it’s a ‘CYBER’ gift – so go hog wild!)2. Write 3 words that describe me on paper and take a picture of it.

3. A self portrait of you doing a dorky face in the mirror.
Wow. Lookie there. I asked for something for me and only me. BABY STEPS DR. MARVIN!

Shaun keeps asking me what I want for my birthday. I already bought it off of ebay for 25 bucks. The picture taken with that present is at the top of the page. Yes, another lens. It sounds crazy, but I can tell you which one of my lens took what picture. I’m that big of a geek.

What do I want from Shaun for my birthday? A CLEAN MINI VAN TO PICK YOUR CHILDREN UP IN! Yes, I want you to clean like you have OCD! spend like 12 bucks on quarters to suck the living shit out of the carpet that houses more fast food salt than any other vehicle on the road. The dashboard…ARMOUR ALL THAT BASTARD! I mean, NOOKS AND CRANNIES of the car.
I know a GREAT example: Remember how the inside looked when we bought the car? YEP! That’s what I want for my birthday.

(I’m thinking he would rather just go buy a new car than clean the one we have) and there you have it. Tuesday’s post.