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You know those, “Everything I know, I learned….”

I’m thinking I might be able to run my whole life and be happy if I just follow the rules of Caesar Malan.

If you’ve never watched The Dog Whisperer, you are going to be totally clueless as to what I am saying here, but since Shaun in a loud, assertive voice told me to, “Go Dog Whisperer on her ass!” I haves been listening more closely to the things that Caesar has been saying and not only applying them to my life with Halo-the-dog-from-hell, but also the people in my life.

Calm & Assertive. I will not SCREAM, “NO! DOWN! BAD! STOP! COME HERE! LISTEN TO ME!” because my screaming isn’t making the dog…or the person..listen any better.
When a person…er…dog gets to the point of freaking the fuck out about something, I need to be the calm one.

Caesar is the pack leader. It doesn’t mean that the dogs don’t WANT to bit him, but they dont. I don’t care if people want to get in my face and try to dominate me…I just need to let them know that they can’t. CALMLY. Not by yelling. Not by writing an email that clearly states my side of the issue, because some people are just really dumb and it doen’t matter how you deal with them they are still going to wet the carpet and drool on your couch. wait. i’m confusing people and dogs again.

In other words, there have been people that are in my life that would like to bite at my heels and then try to make nice later. This isn’t going to happen anymore. I won’t yell back, but I also won’t play nicey nicey anymore.

Caesar has this thing he calls ‘Follow The Leader’ where before he steps out the door, he makes sure that the dog knows that he’s the leader by having the leash high up on the dogs neck, like in a dog show, and if the dog runs ahead or pulls then he gives the leash a nice little tug and the dog drops back behind him…letting Caesar be the pack leader.

For some people in my life…you’re going to start feeling a little tug.