Not Politically Correct…

It’s hard to write about a certain person in my life. I want to be able to write like I talk around her…and how she talks to me, but I would get hate mail FLOODING my inbox.

“OH.MY.GOD…YOU SAID THE “N” WORD!”

It’s hard to defend myself in email.

“SHE CALLS ME THE “N” WORD FIRST!”

Auntie Patty is a one of a kind. She isn’t exactly ‘politically correct’ either. She can take a joke. She can dish em too. She doesn’t use those nice, fuzzy words like, ‘African American’. If you play bones (Dominos) with her she will insist that you insult the mothers of the other players with various types of cuss words. She will call you the “N” word. She will be angry at you if you don’t tell her to ‘shut your black ass up!’
I love this woman.

This weekend we had her birthday party. She has the coolest friends that came to visit with her and bring her presents.
At one point in the night one of her friends was bragging about how well her black husband was doing up here in ‘white man land’.
“The last time we were here, he sat in the corner and didn’t talk to anyone. He was afraid someone was going to hang him or something. But look at him now talking to that handsome, white man.”

We all looked in the window to see her husband leaning near the fireplace in a comfortable conversation with a handsome, white man.

I started laughing so hard, “That’s SHAUN!” I turn to look at her all serious like, “Shaun was born in Oakland, California. The reason your husband is doing so well is because Shaun thinks he was born a poor, black man. HAVE YOU SEEN HIS LIPS? He says they hand them out if you’re born in Oakland regardless of your skin color.”
After the laughing ended she insisted that I had the best looking white man she has seen in a long time. I will take that as a compliment.

As we were leaving the party I told Shaun, “You know your idea of putting the candles in the watermelon? I told Auntie Patty and she started cracking up. She just loves you. Did she grab your ass on the way out?”

Happy Birthday Auntie Patty!