Primo Weed

It has come to my attention that a certain ex-husband of mine is reading my blog.
Don’t freak out, I don’t care if he reads my blog. He’s a dorky dork-wad nerdlinger booger nose. See, I can say things about him because he knows they are true.
He also knows he can withhold the child support and throw me into financial ruin so I can’t say anything too mean.

It has also come to my attention that my step son is subscribed to my blog and probably has been reading it for quite some time. If so, Hello Ryan. I love you kiddo…I hope you know that. I have always loved you and I always will, no matter if your dad, the dorky dork-wad nerdlinger booger nose, are together or not. You’ll always, always, always be my step son and I will always think of you as my step son. always. forever. get over it, you’re stuck with me.

It has also come to my attention that my beautiful friend Lisa’s daughter is reading my blog. I guess I will have to stop talking about boob hair and certain things that happen when the kids are not here. I won’t be able to talk about the wild and crazy parties we have and how when the kids are at their other parents house we take quick trips to Disneyland, eat nothing but cake for dinner and how we get jugglers and bouncy rooms in the front yard just so we can play for hours and hours. I guess I am going to have to stop writing about things that make me *wiggle eyebrows*

It has ALSO come to my attention that my daughter is quite addicted to reading a certain blog that totes the tagline FUCK FUCKING FUCKER on the top of her masthead. Yes, my daughter is not too happy that I am sending her to her fathers while Pissy Britches is here.
AND I QUOTE:
“MOM, I wanna meet Pissy Britches and RSG!”
“You will, you’re not going to be hanging around the whole time though.”
“Is it because she cusses all the time?”
“Shut the fuck up Kara.”
*12 year old laughter* “Yeah, I didn’t think so.”
“No, it’s not that. You’re a fun-stopper honey. I love you, but you’re a fun-stopper.”
I think if she could have cussed and gotten away with not getting slapped in the back of the head she would have tried it.

It has ALSO been brought to my attention that I forgot to mention that STUFF PORTRAIT FRIDAY will be pushed over to Renee’s blog this Friday. She is babysitting it for me for one week while I am in a drunken stooper and in a brownie and zucchini bread induced coma.

and last but not least. I have to get off the computer or Shaun is going to kick my ass into next week.