Overpowered by two little girls and a pink razor

Today the 6 year old smacked into the only little girl in first grade with a titanium skull and she knocked out her front tooth. The other one is coming out within hours.
They were baby teeth, but still, her tooth fell out of her head because she hit Emily-the-brick-wall.

Since the other tooth is all wiggly, I wanted to feel it. The 7 year old, knowing her mother like she does, warns the 6 year old not to let me, that I will ‘yank it out with great force’. The 6 year old is now leery of letting me near her mouth. This, of course, leads into tickling. It’s amazing that these two little girls can fight with each other until my ears bleed, but when it comes to tickle wars, they have each other’s backs. I have the 6 year old in a pretty good head lock and the giggling is at high pitch when the 7 year old starts to help her out of the head lock with the only known tactic she can use that she knows will work without fail. She licks me. I FREAK out of course because there is nothing grosser than a 7 year old licking you.
They get out of the head lock and run down the hall, the giggling getting louder. I follow…my robe waving behind me like Superman. “I’m going to get you!” I hear the bedroom door slam, but of course there is no lock and I open the door to find them climbing up on the top bunk. I’m up there before they are and I got tickling hand ready.

The seven year old isn’t getting enough attention. “Mommy!! you want to tickle me! you want to bite my arms (they are pretty tasty arms)”I stop the 6 year old assault and start chasing the 7 year old out of the room and into the kitchen. She’s not there. She’s not in the living room. Stop to check the score on the Kings vs. Lacer’s game. I hear them in the bathroom now. They have the door half way shut and I slide across the floor and the door is about two inches from being shut.
That’s when it happened. I got overpowered by two little girls. They got the door shut AND LOCKED.

They were easily tricked with the ‘shutting of my bedroom door’ trick. The door opened and I got in. The 7 year old jumped in the shower and grabbed the bottle of shampoo and a pink razor (no worries, it was the kind without razor blades in it) Somehow it ended up in my closet where I got beat to hell with a pair of flip flops.

I am so screwed when they are teenagers.