WE HAVE A CALIFORNIA MAP!

Many of you know about the BlogHer conference they are having in California at the end of July.

It’s really not THAT far from my house, but when I checked it out…it seemed like it might be a bit ‘too much’ for me. Too much meaning…WAY THE FUCK OVER MY HEAD.
When I read it the first time it seemed like it might be like a high school reunion for the popular kids. People like me that hung out in the photography lab or the drama club wouldn’t exactly fit in.

I tried to imagine me looking for a fellow smoker to hang out with at lunch and only finding people that talked about setting up their blog using Feng Shui or how much traffic you got on your blog while fanning the smoke I would purposely blow in their faces.
I would of course be wearing a shirt that said, ” You are dumb ” in binary and I would probably be kicked out before the second half of the conference.

The conference is about exposure. It’s about getting out there and showing what you have.
*blink*
*looking around*
*blink*
I have you guys. Can you all come with me? I promise to share the D70, I promise not to blow smoke in your face, I won’t take pictures of you when you’re all asleep on my floor with a Polly Pocket embedded in your cheek. I lie. I would totally get you all blasted just so I could get good blackmail pictures.

The conference is also about some other stuff, like Geeky Tech stuff (Or so Striz PROMISES) and legal stuff. Two of my favorite things! Law and Geeky Tech Stuff!!

Honestly, if Striz hadn’t promised me booze and smokes the night before the conference I probably wouldn’t have even considered it. I’m not about exposure, I’m not about hanging out with cool kids. I’m about a pack of smokes, bottle of Merlot and blackmail shots of you wearing Spongebob underwear.

Did I mention that beach (the one with the old ass on it) is on it’s way to Santa Clara?

Who’s in? I have lots of floor space and air mattresses.