Kath and I were talking about feeling guilty for things that happen. I told her I don’t feel guilt. I mean, I have guilt…I guess I just don’t do things that will cause me to feel horribly guilty later.
But when I am in one of those moods, it hits me like a ton of bricks. I’m in one of ‘those’ moods. I’m thinking about all the things I have done, bridges I burned, people in my life, things that have been done to hurt me in the past.
I wish I could let everyone know that I have hurt in the past that I do feel bad. I could categorize all the people in certain rows:
Sorry for not being ‘the one’ and wasting your time.
Sorry for doing something REALLY wrong to ruin your life.
Sorry for not realizing how important you were to me until you were gone.
Sorry for taking one path and leaving you on another.
Some people actually can fit into all of those ‘sorry’ categories.
Some people need a couple more:
Sorry for not noticing that when you made me CD’s that you wrote the name of it on that little side so I could see what CD it was without having to pull it out. I noticed that today. 4 years too late.
Sorry for leaving the cheese out. maybe if I had been a bit more grown up we would have had more fun when we lived together.
I’m sorry for not saying thank you enough. I should have 14,000 frequent flyer miles.
I’m sorry I forgot to call.
I’m sorry I called when I shouldn’t have. It’s better to leave well enough alone.
I guess there are patterns in people’s lives, and because of it, here’s one last sorry:
I’m sorry I pushed you away because I didn’t know how to tell you that I wasn’t happy with you anymore.