I heard this song last night at the gym and remembered a couple times in my life where this song brought me to my knees in tears.
When Dan and I ended our marriage and I started to figure out who I was without being a part of someone else and I was blessed with this strength, I began to understand what ‘joy’ really meant.
That woman in her apartment with her 3 very, very little girls eating PB&J and enjoying nothing more than sitting out at the pool or going to the park…I thought she was so strong. I wasn’t all that strong back then, but I was strong enough to stand up for what I believed in. I believed that SOMEDAY I would be able to find true happiness and show my girls what that looked like.
I thought I had failed them, but I realized something yesterday. My oldest daughter who was about 6 or 7 when her dad and I split up was on a date with her boyfriend of almost 3 years last night. My middle daughter sat on the floor of the gym as I tossed her father the medicine ball and said, “I’m glad you’re friends.”
11 years ago I was willing to walk away from my whole life, the security, the safety for what I believed in,—that there is something you never compromise on…and that is the real thing you NEED in love.
I’m willing to be alone for that.
3 responses to “I believe…”
Amen! Do you know I have never heard this song before today! Wish I had 11 years ago when I left my ex. Maybe it would have helped him with every thing lol. I still hope someday he will get past it all and be a part of his children’s lives. Even though they are almost all grown up. (and to give me a chance to give him a really good smack up side the head just once for not being there for his kids because it was just to hard for him to be a part time dad ppppfffffffft lol)
It’s a beautiful and heart breaking song.
I hear you on all of that. And it’s wonderful when you realize that along with the things you might feel badly about, your kids also see the good and they learn from that too.
I’m in a place where I’m willing to be alone until I know what I want. Until forever if I never do. I have no love goals. Just living my life and making the most of every day.