It’s the Itchy and Scratchy Shooooowwww…

And this is what I was doing at 4 am when my body rejected the new antibiotics.

I broke out again in welts and the itching was 10 times worse than the last time. It felt like my skin was going to catch fire.

I finally lost it.  Being scared, frustrated and itching…I couldn’t handle it anymore. I cried like a sissy-la-la until the 3 Benedryl kicked in and I finally passed out.
My sympathy level for those people who are chronically sick has hit the roof.  I am SOOOO sorry for the pain you’re in. I’m sorry for those of you, especially my friend Susie, who has battled with the WTF (they don’t know what’s wrong so she named it) I’m going through this for a reason, I know…I’m not 100% why, I’m sure it’s not for the kids though. This is for me.

Today is 9/11 and I am suppose to ‘remember’ and honestly I wouldn’t have today if I hadn’t gotten an email to remind me with all the horrific pictures.  It’s not because I’m heartless or not American enough.  Tomorrow is Tyler’s 18th birthday and every single year it’s rained on a little bit by the news, by sad reminders of people jumping out of windows and burning buildings.  The loss of life on this day was staggering, not just the ones who died, but the ones who survived and now have to keep moving on with that loss of a friend, co-worker, mom, dad, brother or sister…and the list continues.
I want to celebrate life, Tyler’s birthday and the way we have healed since that day.    Today, my television stays off and I refuse to open the emails.