The Fonz is Packin’

I don’t know if I ever told you. My mom-The Fonz, She has a dead on aim and can hit anything standing still or jumping from tree to tree from a mile away.

You wouldn’t think that by looking at that innocent lady above that she has on many occation, pulled out her gun and shot people.

You’re on to me, She hasn’t shot anyone. yet. She could though. she’s packin.

I think I was around 15 when we were at the grocery market with my mom.
She had cruised every isle and got all the food she thought we would need for the week.
My mom, God love her, has a good 3 minutes to find her wallet before getting to the counter to pay for her goods, but she waits until we get to the front of the line to heave her 20 pound purse onto that tiny little square that is normally used for people writing chcecks.

“Kristine?” She’s looking around and in the basket for something, “Where’s my wallet?”

I put my hands into her purse, which is the size of very large diaper bag, and start helping her to look.

This is where the story just goes wrong.

She pulls the purse off the tiny square and starts pulling items from her purse to make it easier to find the wallet.

The first item out the bag is a Smith and Wesson .357 Magnum with a 6″ barrel. She very carefully places this Dirty Harry on the tiny square and begins to dig deeper into the bag.

I grew up with guns. If you didn’t get a gun for your birthday you were offended and hurt. Most girls were asking for Barbies and I was asking for Pachmayr Grips for my .38 S&W snub nose or some grain so I could reload bullets.

The boy behind the counter…was NOT raised around guns.

I looked up at the boy and it took a second to register that look. It was fear. He was scared shitless. He was probably wetting himself.

“MOM…put the gun back in your purse.”

My sweet, sweet, sweet mother looks at the boy, looks at the gun, and instead of reassuring the boy that she’s not here to rob him and shoot his pimply head off, says in the most mater of fact voice;

“It’s okay, I have a concealed weapons permit.”