The wedding was set for 10 am, July 8th 2006.  I was actually ON TIME.  It’s a first in Kristine history.  I have been told that I will be late for my own funeral, so the fact that I was on time just tells me, this isn’t the end for me.

We woke up the kids to, “Who wants to be in a wedding?”
Alyx jumped up and was ready to go. The two younger ones had gotten dressed the night before and just fell asleep in the clothes they were going to wear over to the place we were getting married.
Tyler came out and sat on the end of the couch wondering WHY in God’s name did we have to be up so early.  He didn’t have hair and make-up that needed to be done so why couldn’t he just go back to sleep until 9:30?

After we got to The Victorian, I went upstairs where my sister in law, Terrie was already getting the dresses ready.  You know that question, “If you were stranded on a deserted island, what would you bring?”  I now can honestly say, “Terrie”.  She could build a hut, spear a fish, cook it and clean up the whole island in the time it would take for me to figure out I had no cellular coverage.  Did I mention she has had 2 hip replacements? Yeah, she’s the friggin’ Terminator.

I’m doing a wedding next month for Kimmy and Nick and since I’m doing fora very low, low price, Kimmy did my make up for free.  You will NEVER see me with my make up done so perfectly again.  Enjoy he  pictures while you can because once you see the honeymoon pictures, you’ll be laughing.  I can go from Paris Hilton to Tammy Faye in just hours.

Kathy, my most awesomest sister, did my hair.  We were trying to figure out if we liked it minues before I walked down the stairs.  She said to me, “Kristine…don’t flip your hair. Don’t fluff your hair. In fact, don’t touch it. AT.ALL”  and I didn’t. I resisted the urge for 80’s hair for my wedding.
It was weird standing at the foot of the stair case waiting to go down.  The dozen of times I had walked those stairs I said to myself that the squeeking was going to be so loud that everyone was going to laugh.  I never heard the squeeking. I didn’t hear anything, but the wedding march.
As I rounded the second part of the stairs I could see Shaun in his tux.  It was breath taking.  I started to walk towards him without any thought in my head.  I felt my dad grab my arm and start walking with me.  I looked into the crowd of friends and family.  Some were already teary.  My friend, Ruka was there with her baby boy.  Her beautiful step daughter had gotten all dressed up for the occation and I wanted to remember to tell her thank you for that, but I couldn’t remember anything a second after I got to Shaun.

The ceremony was painless.  Before the wedding I thought about every single word that was going to be said.  I didn’t want Dan (my ex) and Tabitha (Shaun’s ex) to be uncomfortable at any point so we omitted some things and added others.  I didn’t want anyone to feel left out of this day. I wanted the girls to be so much a part of the wedding that if I could I would have put them all in front of me and hugged them close.   It’s weird thinking about all this now as I type it because I didn’t think about anything, but Shaun’s hands in mine.  Every second we listened and spoke we were seconds closer to being husband and wife.

He said the words, “I do.” and  I couldn’t wait to say, “I do” back.
As I was standing there I remembered when we first met.  “This guy is marrying me.” is what I wanted to say out loud.

When it was over and we turned to the crowd I thought, “perfect.”  It was perfect.  My wedding was just PERFECT for us.

Being the Best Man, Tyler’s job was to give a toast.  He was so mature, funny and nervous all at the same time.  His dad was so proud as he cracked jokes and made everyone laugh.
I was watching him in his tux and I thought, ‘He’s a man now.’
We’ve known this for awhile, but as he stood there with the speech in one hand and his mic in the other, smiling and just playing the crowd with his smile and humor…he just was…just…a man.

The things he said about his dad made me so proud.  When he said I was a great mother I almost lost it.  I could feel the tears coming, but he ended it just in time.

Kara stood up for her part of the speech and she got through the first line and started to tear up.  This of course had a ripple effect through the whole place.  I never took my leaky eyes off of her as she spoke.

I have seen Shaun cry once before and it was painful.  We cried together when we thought it was the end of our relationship and we would be parting ways.  I never wanted to see him cry again.  Last week when he stayed home sick he was playing on the computer and after 5 minutes of watchin UTube where people were being scared he fell into a fit of laughter that gave him the giggles so bad he burst into tears.  That was painful to watch too, but not as painful as watching him fight off tears as Kara said her toast.
I couldn’t take it. I cried. I cried some more.  The whole place was tearing up.

I couldn’t have been more proud of her as she sat down and wiped off her own tears of happiness.

After the ceremony we slipped outside to get all the pictures. I was finally relaxed and the blood started to circulate again.
Our families decided to chip in and pay for someone to take pictures.   When he came upstairs to get the first few pictures I didn’t see him because I was having this stuff called, ‘foundation’ put on.  I heard a ‘click’ and I said without missing a beat, “I hear a Nikon D2X.”  He laughed at me and told me that he had already gotten the guys in their tuxes and they looked great.  It was real now.

My family gathered outside and we got all the pictures taken.  My most awesome brother, Jerry (who is now my favorite) had our professional like pictures taken with his CAT hat on.  You’ve wondered how Red Neck are we?  This should answer your question; He was holding a Budweiser can in a beer can cooly DURING the pictures.  The best part is…he brought his OWN  BEER!

My dad came in a polo shirt and turned off his hearing aides because ‘Everyone is talking too damn loud.’  He had to ask me what we were dancing to during our Father/Daughter dance.

My mother, at the end of the day pulled her hair up into a clippy and put on her slippers.  I was so hot and sweaty I offered her a hundred bucks for her hair clip.  The bitch that she is said, “Never.”

I don’t remember if I have ever mentioned my mother’s sister, Auntie Joanne or not.  As cool as my mom is, Auntie Joanne surpasses it.   She is my mother’s best friend and when that woman managed to get her old ass up the stairs while I was getting dressed and I saw her face, I almost lost it.
My Auntie Joanne, who we have called ‘Lucy’ for as many years as I can remember was standing there smiling that smile that just made me want to throw her into a car and take her to Vegas because even though she is about 3 days older than dirt now, she could probably out run me and have everyone from the hotel clerk to the casino managers in tears of laughter.

When my mom heard her voice, “Nannnncy.”  my mom’s voice cracked as she tried to get to her and pull her into her arms for a hug. “Jooooannnne!”.  I cry thinking about it.  I swear those two women are me and my sister in about 40 years.  I don’t think a day will come when the sight of my sister doesn’t make me feel safe and happy.

It was the small moments like this one that made my wedding perfect.  The topper was having my aunt and uncle who have been married for over 50 years be my witnesses and sign my certificate as witnesses.  Being that they are 3 days older than dirt, it took about a good 30 minutes to convince my uncle that he just had to sign and put his address on the paper.
“Ohhhh, I don’t have email.  I don’t have a computer.”  My aunt who is use to him by now just kept saying, “FRITZ, FILL OUT THE PAPER!”  She then would turn and wink at me and say, “He can’t hear a damn thing.  Stupid hearing aids.”

Did I mention we danced?  Kathy filmed it and her husband put together a video for us. (Check he bottom of this post for a link)

After it was over I  found my friend, ‘Cita who, I swear is going to heaven, was one of my right arms during my wedding.  She looked WORN OUT.  I told her I was going upstairs to get something when I knew if I made it up the stairs I would be putting back on the clothes I came in. Sweats and a tank top.  Yes, this girl is still a damn redneck!

Ten minutes later I waddled to the top of the stairs and called out her name.  I was STUCK IN MY DRESS!  I mean, STUCK.  The dress was a zippy from the side type and the hooks that the you use to hang it on the hanger was stuck in the zipper.

She had to almost RIP the zipper out.  The bra was like a bullet proof vest that was now about 60lbs heavier because I was sweating.

When it came off I was sooooo happy!!