My FB/Blog friend, Cecily, posted the letter that she wrote to her 20 year self after reading one her friend had written. I too, took on the challenge. It’s funny what we learn in the process.

Dear 20 something year old Kristine,

I’ve struggled with what I should tell you. The things you did in your 20’s is what got me to here, and ‘here’ is really good.  I don’t think I would have enjoyed being ‘here’ if I didn’t go through the things I did.

First off, stay fearless.  Somewhere in your 20’s you lost that side of yourself. You tucked it so far away that the 38 year old you is still having a hard time getting that back.
You’ll marry that guy you met on the motorcycle on Mother’s Day on your way to see your mom and sister.  He will try to pull out even more fearlessness in you…let him.  In fact, you’ll pay for him to go skydiving shortly after you get into your 20’s.  When he says, “Kristine, you will LOVE THIS! you have to try it.” don’t be so closed to the idea because the thought scares the living shit out of your more than being being attacked in a parking lot and beat to death.  Go with him.  I know, I know…you just threw up a little thinking about it.
But then again, maybe you shouldn’t because when you do it in your late 30’s, it’s magical and changes your life forever.

Remember that time in the bedroom in the apartment when you were 18 and you screamed at your clothing because it didn’t fit?  Here’s a newsflash sweetie; all of your 20’s you’ll be pregnant anyway so don’t sweat it.   At the end of your 20’s after you have that last kid, join a gym.
But then again, maybe you shouldn’t because that woman who was squishy from all the baby fat…got me to the woman I am now, and I know I’m far from ‘hot’, but I’m not too obsessed with how I look and trying to find 100 new ways to look better, and that makes more time to spend with the people I love.

You’re going to meet someone that changes all that hurt you felt and he’s going to make everything right in your world.  He’s going to help you heal all those wounds you didn’t know you had. He’s going to teach you how to trust yourself and those around you again….and you’re going to screw it up somehow…my advise you is, don’t screw it up!  Don’t let the circumstance of the love you have and the distance between you put a knife in it.
But then again, screw it up…because in your late 30’s you’re going to meet someone that makes all the stupid shit you went through in your early 30’s worth it and if you didn’t mess that one up, you wouldn’t be with him.

In a last ditch effort to find something to give you…
Don’t worry about what you’re friends think.  They all suck and you won’t be friends with any of them later in life anyway.  Actually there is one friend that sticks by you…listen to her because later in life she’ll give you advise you won’t listen to and it fucks some things up, ROYALLY. She should be your best friend, but she’s not…but be good to her because you’re going to need her in your 30’s.
All that stress over being a step parent and making sure you’re doing it right, don’t stress that shit,  it turns out the way it was spose to turn out and no matter how hard you try to be the perfect step parent, it doesn’t mean anything.
Don’t let Dan remove the fence in the backyard of the house you buy, you’ll spend the next 20 years trying to kill the weeds that come from behind that fence.

Digital cameras are not just a phase.
Don’t sell your Mustang, you’ll miss it in your 30’s.

Make all the same mistakes, just do it gracefully.  Your 30’s are going to start out amazing and then it sucks and then it gets pretty amazing again.  All the stupid mistakes and neat things you’re doing in your 20’s will get me right to where I am today and 38 year old Kristine found out what it means to be strong and that no matter what, I will survive and life goes on.

Love,
Late 30’s Kristine