I am so blind.

Again, my world just spun out of my control.
I look at my life and how hard I have tried to just be that person that has it all together and everything looks like it is where it should be.
At what point to do I just say, “That isn’t the way your life is going to go…You’re going to have a life of color and varying experiences.”
I’m crazy, why I can’t I just embrace that? Why I can’t I embrace the fact that I always get what I want and it is NEVER the way I wanted it?
There is a night in my near future that I am going to just have to sit outside with a single bottle of wine and just ask myself the question, “Why not. Why do you care what anyone thinks anyway?”
Someday I will look back and will I just say, “I didn’t love because it didn’t look the way I thought it should be.”

…or I can not worry about it and just let go.