I decided after watching a lot of the late night infomercials that after 35 things need to be taken note of. Like, “You shouldn’t take … if you’re 35 and smoke.” “If you’re 35 and smoke, please consult your doctor.” “You can NOT take this if you’re 35 and still smoking like a house on fire.”
I decided about 3 months ago that I was going to quit smoking on my 35th birthday, because that is what the television told me to do. Do not smoke after you’re 35 or you won’t be able to take all the pills later in life that is going to make me die healthier.
This was the plan; Kara’s birthday is Friday and mine is Saturday. I have a wedding to shoot on Saturday (yes, ON my birthday) so I was going to quit on Kara’s birthday. What a gift to give your child. Your mother around longer. Whooopie.
So Thursday night, the lungs and I were going to get all dressed up and hit the town. A little bit of the bar scene, a tad of trippin’ the light fantastic and a stroll around a smoky casino. It was going to be a fabulous time had by all. I was going to send the people at Phillip and Morris pictures of the night and they were going post it on a billboard for all the world to enjoy. It would be me and my slightly charred lungs with a top hat and me in my shaker girl costume dancing and smoking. Can you hear the music and see the lights?
And then the cold hit. Last night I only had one smoke and went to bed. This morning I got a visit from left lung. He came flying up out of my throat after some strange half cough, half sneeze maneuver.
”Whoa! Dude.” He said. “Do you know how many times I thought you were going to actually do that in High School? I mean, cough up a lung?!”
”Hi lung.” I say. I mean, what do you say to a lung you have abused your whole life?
”Hey, about Thursday.” He shuffles around a bit, “I’m not feeling much like going out. I know we made plans, but damnnnnnn that cold really kicked my ass and I’m not thinking I can withstand one of your all night smoking binges. Especially if you decide to go with the 100’s. I don’t think I can handle it. We are almost 35 you know?”
”Yeah, that’s why I wanted to have a party.” I know my lungs are right. It doesn’t change the fact that I wanted one last hoorah with them before I put down the lighter forever. “How about this? I quit smoking now, but I get a mulligan later in life? Just one hoorah out of the blue for no reason? Deal?”
My lung didn’t look convinced. “No way. You did that to me after you stopped smoking for like 5 years. Do you remember how trashed I was? I couldn’t even function right for days.”
”So this is it? That lame cigarette I smoked last night was THEE last smoke? I didn’t even enjoy it. My throat hurt and I couldn’t even taste it. “
“Yep.”
And so begins the task of a life of smoke free living…and trying to figure out how to get my left lung back into my chest cavity.
34 responses to “hello lungs, it’s me…Kristine”
Delurking to say I am proud of you.
Goodluck.
Jamie
Oh my God, and do I get to say “First Bitches!”???
Again, Best of luck.
You can do it! The internet will help you…or youll replace the smoking with being online a lot more than you were, but its slightly better than smoking. Youll do great.
I’ve never smoked anything, but I know quite a bit about coughing out copious amounts of green goo. I don’t see how your lungs would be able to handle any more yuckiness.
You are being kind to your body when you stop smoking. And I’m sure those who live in the same house will appreciate cleaner air.
Good Luck.
35 was a long ago age for me.
The advertisements are correct–the body parts begin complaining and the medical bills grow higher.
However, the wisdom which comes with experience is real handy.
Tell Kara Happy Birthday for me. I’ve been really really busy in real life the last couple weeks, so Blogsville got neglected.
Working on your birthday is okay. I had to do it many times. The sun will rise the next day and starting over is guaranteed.
~~love and Huggs, Diane
Yes!!! You can do it! I am sooo proud that you have made this decision. And you know I will help you any way I can. I love you!
Keeping my fingers crossed for you and wishing you much willpower and luck.
Stick with it.
Fabulous! I am so proud of you.
Someone in your house
Is
Going
To
Get Slapped
Really
Hard
Soon
I know you can do it!!
My sister quit last year after 30 years of smoking and she feels great today.
It’s worth it all.
You know, that’s actually why my boyfriend’s dad quit. He had a cold so bad that it hurt him to think about smoking, for like two weeks. After that, he just didn’t buy any more cigarettes and hasn’t smoked since. It was almost by accident.
Pain is the body’s way of saying “Cut that shit out!” I’m glad that you’re at least able to hear it when you get a visit from the ghost of lungy present. (That was a Dickens reference)
fabulous! :)
here’s to success…
peace…
All you smokers aren’t there won’t leave me because I have put down the lighter will ya?
I want to still hang out. I’ll still be that cool friend that still hangs out and doesn’t complain when you blow smoke in my face and call me a ‘quiter!”
Good luck! I am quitting next year. For my 30th.
come on Katie. Quit with me!!
Congrats!!!! and uhhhh, talking to your lung is bad for your health…or something, lol.
Yeah Kristine…today is day number 30 for me…my best advice…LOTS AND LOTS of cold water…when you crave a smoke, suck down that water fast!
You can do it…one day at a time, each day it is your choice…and you choose not to smoke!
YEAH!
I’m tyring to quit right now too. I’d be doing fine were it not for the fact that I’m still sneaking them here and there….
We put an offer on a house yesterday and Mike and I agreed that both of us have to have quit prior to the closing date (May 1), so I’m quitting with you :)
I would like to wish the rest of your household good luck in dealing with this life changing situation.
“What a gift to give your child. Your mother around longer. Whooopie.”–CLASSIC.
Good for you!
Good luck! I know you can do it!
Good for you!!!!
Good for you! My friend’s mom has lung cancer right now, and seeing her would make anyone quit cold turkey. I know it’s hard, but you have a lot to live for!
I gotta quit too
But I don’t want to get fatter.
;)
Yea! Good job Kristine!
My mom and her sister quit in 2001 and they were the people that would NEVER be able to quit!
I can’t tell you how thankful I am that she quit. I have asthma and I know that her smoking did not help me at all. (nothing like shoving some guilt down your throat!)
You are worth it! Besides, she and my dad now get to take a vacation every year with the money that they saved!
I do believe the way to avoid the fat is to start an exercise regime along with eating healty. It works well in two ways it’s releases endorphines to make you feel good and not crave nicotine so much and you are losing weight at the same time can’t beat that. I am saying this from experience.
I will quit with you! I haven’t smoked since last night so that will be my last too! I am a closet smoker though so none of this will be on my blog…I will just come here to let you know how I’m doing. I will be 35 this year too so I guess it is time.
ugh, I keep telling myself I need to quit again. I can’t believe I ever started again after quiting for five years!
Good luck!
Yeah Kris!
Imagine how much money you’re going to save???
Good luck!
OMG, Kristine… this just cracked me up!
But seriously, I am so PROUD of you that you quit smoking.
My Mom quit around the same age that you’re now and hasn’t touched a cigarette since. You can do it. You’ll feel so much better, believe me.
Ahm yes, I confess, I don’t know what it’s like to smoke, because I never touched a cigarette in my life, but I can’t think of ANYTHING that makes it worth smoking.
Yippee! You can do it!!
Also think of all the money you will save…I never smoked but damn…a pack of cigarettes for almost $4!! That’s $16 a month (if you smoke a pack a week which from what I understand usually isn’t the case) to have someone pump chemicals into your body that will shorten your life and cost you more in medical bills at the Doctor’s office. I’ve never understood it.
That’s $200 a year! Damn…I can think of a million things I would rather do with that money.
I’m 35 on Monday. Not looking forward to it.
Hey I applaud your lungs for coming out to you so boldly! My lungs just decided to get a Disease called COPD. Same shit that killed my grandpa! I am 35 and it sucks not to breath. If any one knows me and the abuse that my lungs have endoured it is you. I, too, am on the desperate road to quit. It is the only “bad” thing I have left, everything else is gone. So I give you a standing ovation for even giving it a shot. With as crazy as your house can get! Shaun may even kiss you more. Who knows! =)
Oh Side note to Shell: here in Maui they are $5.15 (for Basic) per pack and we smoke a pack a day. Soooooooo I could potentially save $154.50 a month. (Hell that is my electric bill!) Makeing it $1854 per year. Sooooo anyone else out there want to join Kristine and I in this very painful endeavor?
GO YOU!!!! That’s awesome~
My husband’s dad quit smoking on his (my husband’s) 18th birthday. That was 6 years ago, and he’s really healthy now. He even JOGS and such!!
You can do it, go you!! On a flipside to your comment about the lame last cigarette: If you had a GREAT AWESOME last smoke, wouldn’t that make you want to have another? I mean I tend to stop eating something when the food stops tasting as good…
All good luck to you on this — how’s it going?
I keep telling myself to do this, and myself keeps answering “no way”. Maybe we should start a “quitblogging” movement ;-)