…but I’m not going to. I just want to talk about sex. I think it’s because I had the ‘fucked up’ dream I have once every five years. It’s the dream where I find out the person I am having sex with has a detachable penis.
I don’t know what causes me to have this dream. The first time I had it I was about 16.
In this dream I get up and go to the bathroom and when I pull down my pants…A PENIS.
For some reason I think, “I have a penis, I need to take a bath.” While in the bath examining my new penis my mom knocks on the door. I take off the penis and put it in a Kleenex box.
(I’m thrilled by the amount of times I used the word ‘penis’ in that last paragraph…or run-on sentence)
Last night I had the dream again, but the moments UP to and AFTER the discovery that the penis was detachable are very foggy.
The only part of this dream that I remember was holding the penis and looking at it saying,
“But, how do you get it to stay on?”
I can’t be the only person in the world that has dreams about detachable penises.