Random and Odd

The Dark Passenger…

The Dark Passenger…, originally uploaded by Suddenly Single.

I was having the most beautiful dream last night.
There was this beautiful lake and I was surrounded by people I adore. The sun was so hot it was stinging my skin and I walked up on this plank that over looked the lake. Everyone was joking as if they were going to push me in, but before they could make their way to me, I began to run and when my feet left the plank and hit the cold water I was filled with this amazing, joyful feeling.
I grabbed at the weeds at the bottom of the lake and pulled my legs down and pushed off from the rocky bottom and pushed my way out of the water.
It wasn’t anything like the feeling when your feet leave the door of an airplane, but it had that same feeling of joy I get.

When I woke up I felt like I understood what I wanted more than anything I have ever wanted. No, not to go swimming or go skydiving (even though, either one of those sounds fabulous right now) I want that feeling of complete freedom.
No one stopping me from realizing what I know is good for me, and that includes myself. I’ve said it before, and it always rings true. I tend to get in the way of my happiness. Block my own bliss.

You know that moment when you stop holding on to something that isn’t right for you and you’re rewarded tenfold? That is how I feel right now. I keep letting go and just when I feel those blessing start coming in, I turn around and grasp onto what is safe.
When my feet left the plank, there was nothing to hold on to and I was rewarded greatly.

Ready to jump!

I'm a lot of things, but mostly I'm just Random and Odd.