{"id":4159,"date":"2026-07-08T13:55:31","date_gmt":"2026-07-08T20:55:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/?p=4159"},"modified":"2026-07-08T13:55:31","modified_gmt":"2026-07-08T20:55:31","slug":"digging-through-old-shit","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/?p=4159","title":{"rendered":"Digging through old shit…."},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Yes, I now that I am in the middle of writing about the cool shit I got to see during my holiday in\u00a0 London buuuuuuuuut\u00a0 As I was cleaning the shit off this computer I found some stuff I had written awhile ago and I just never shared it because why the fuck should I? oh boo hoo me, writing prompting the fuck out of my life.\u00a0 I was going to write it into a book, but the book I was working on went to shit and I ended up hating both the MMC and the FMC and they had zero character arc.
\nIn my class we talk about the character’s writing themselves and it’s very true.\u00a0 \u00a0The shitty part about that is that sometimes they are just shitty people.\u00a0 \u00a0So instead of deleting all this shit…I will put it here.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The end of what we shared was played out in a text to a friend.<\/em><\/p>\n

She didn\u2019t know what I went through before I lit us on fire.<\/em>
\nThe begging to stop. The threats of leaving if I find another stash of your empty bottles in the garage.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0You made a point of referencing a number of times I broke up with you. You have a number, but I have the pain it caused me to say the words, \u201cplease, stop\u2026it is too reminiscent of my youth. I just can\u2019t.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Put your hand over my mouth and don\u2019t let me tell my side.\u00a0 They don\u2019t need to know the truth, it doesn\u2019t fit your narrative of the woman you turned me into.<\/em><\/p>\n

Poke.Poke.Poke.<\/em><\/p>\n

Say you want to hear what is wrong, but only my tears were good enough.<\/em>
\n\u201cDon\u2019t you feel better?\u201d a shy smile after watching me shatter to get your fix.<\/em><\/p>\n

The hottest summer and coldest winter. I offered to fix it, but you wanted me to sweat and watch me shiver.<\/em><\/p>\n

I\u2019m just here to say.<\/em><\/p>\n

Your account was hearsay.<\/em><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t punch the clock at my funeral. Stay in bed with your hangovers.\u00a0 No need to put on your hand me downs and perform for the people you lied to and then smiled when they put me here.<\/em><\/p>\n

They didn\u2019t like you, but they don\u2019t like me either.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Yes, I now that I am in the middle of writing about the cool shit I got to see during my holiday in\u00a0 London buuuuuuuuut\u00a0 As I was cleaning the shit off this computer I found some stuff I had written awhile ago and I just never shared it because why the fuck should I? oh boo hoo me, writing prompting the fuck out of my life.\u00a0 I was going to write it into a book, but the book I was working on went to shit and I ended up hating both the MMC and the FMC and they had zero character arc. In my class we talk about the character’s writing themselves and it’s very true.\u00a0 \u00a0The shitty part about that is that sometimes they are just shitty people.\u00a0 \u00a0So instead of deleting all this shit…I will put it here.   The end of what we shared was played out in a text to a friend. She didn\u2019t know what I went through before I lit us on fire. The begging to stop. The threats of leaving if I find another stash of your empty bottles in the garage. \u00a0You made a point of referencing a number of times I broke up with you. You have a number, but I have the pain it caused me to say the words, \u201cplease, stop\u2026it is too reminiscent of my youth. I just can\u2019t.\u201d Put your hand over my mouth and don\u2019t let me tell my side.\u00a0 They don\u2019t need to know the truth, it doesn\u2019t fit your narrative of the woman you turned me into. Poke.Poke.Poke. Say you want to hear what is wrong, but only my tears were good enough. \u201cDon\u2019t you feel better?\u201d a shy smile after watching me shatter to get your fix. The hottest summer and coldest winter. I offered to fix it, but you wanted me to sweat and watch me shiver. I\u2019m just here to say. Your account was hearsay. Don\u2019t punch the clock at my funeral. Stay in bed with your hangovers.\u00a0 No need to put on your hand me downs and perform for the people you lied to and then smiled when they put me here. They didn\u2019t like you, but they don\u2019t like me either.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4159","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-random"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4159","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4159"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4159\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4164,"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4159\/revisions\/4164"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4159"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4159"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4159"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}