I’m going to start this post with the image of me knocking my hand as hard as I can over and over again into the biggest piece of wood I can find.
\nIt’s been a long time since I’ve opened my email box and found anything other than something nice, words of wisdom and questions on ‘how do you do it?’
\nThank you. Not that I really took the crap emails too seriously, but it’s nice they aren’t there anymore. I’m guessing that people are FINALLY not taking me seriously or the hit-man club I hired is doing it’s job.<\/p>\n
Recently I was reading a friend’s blog where she goes into the terrifying story of her being assaulted and robbed at gun point. In her comments, someone had the nerve to ask her if she had done something really bad in her past life.\u00a0 AS IF someone that was attacked at gun point needs to hear that? Because she did something bad in her “past life” that she deserves what happened to her?<\/p>\n
I like to call mean, hateful words spilled on the internet by people who like to stir shit up, “Internet Balls”.\u00a0 Yes, I said, Internet Balls. It’s currently under review by the editors of Urban Dictionary dot com for submission. I wonder if it will fly?<\/p>\n
Words are the most precious gift we have.\u00a0 We can build people up, offer support, write something that changes our world, or changes the life of a perfect stranger.\u00a0\u00a0 Why anyone would want to use that gift to beat someone up?
\n*throwing up hands* Yes, I am guilty. No, I have never anonymously left a message on someone’s website and bashed them. I have bashed my ex-husband here. Most of the time it’s done out of love, but yes, he pisses me off.\u00a0 Let it be known, when I do write something about him, he is warned and told to either read or or shut up.<\/p>\n
A few months ago I called Shaun’s ex a drama-queen.\u00a0 Well, in my defense, I didn’t call her a drama-queen…I said I knew she was going to get all ‘drama’ on something that happened out of my control.\u00a0 So, what did I do? I called her and told her, “Dude, I called you a drama-queen. I know you’re going to hear about it and I wanted you to hear it from me first.”\u00a0 She laughed and asked me why and we talked about it.<\/p>\n
Don’t get me wrong, we have talked our share of shit. We don’t always see eye to eye. We can ride each other’s nerves to no end.\u00a0 But, I would like think that if she had something crappy about me she needed to say, she would say it to her best friend.\u00a0 I would hope that she wouldn’t post it on the internet for the world (and the children) to see.\u00a0 And yes, we are both guilty of it, but we have apologized and moved on. We are adults. *laughing* okay, whatever.<\/p>\n
Today I read something that went beyond anything I can comprehend.\u00a0 As a reminder, I do not live in a world where everything is happy and fluffy. My life is not perfect. What you read here is not my ENTIRE life and I leave SO much out, not because it’s nobodies business, but because Shaun gets all pissy and eyebrows crawl into his forehead if I do anything that can be construed as ‘drama’ or ‘starting shit’.\u00a0 In the last 4 years, I have to admit…it’s worked.\u00a0 If I manage to keep compacting my emotions and the things I feel I have a right to say; you know JAMMING the hurt down so it will keep the peace…EVERYTHING will be ALRIGHT.\u00a0 You are no stranger to my sarcasm, are you?
\nHe HAD a point though. “If you don’t feed it…it will go else where to find what it’s looking for.”\u00a0 So I just ignored it and like a starving raccoon, it did leave us alone.
\nUntil of course, the little thing gets hungry again and decides it doesn’t matter if I will answer the door, it’s going to bust in the damn thing and go all rabies on our asses.
\nI should stop with the animal references. I am confusing myself and I will be blamed for calling someone a rabies filled raccoon.<\/p>\n
Our family is hurting. We have, in a sense, lost a family member.\u00a0 No one died, but it feels like it.\u00a0 We mourned the loss and then moved on.\u00a0 Even after the mourning process we all still wondered why we had to lose that part of the family.\u00a0 It hurts. Even after the horrible words that were said to me, I still worried about them.
\nAs the months passed, we had truly gotten over it and moved on with our lives.\u00a0 If someone doesn’t want to have anything to do with us, so be it.
\nAnd then out of the blue…we are faced with horrible words.<\/p>\n
Guess who got thrown under the train?\u00a0 Yep, me.\u00a0 Why? I don’t know.\u00a0 I had NOTHING to do with anything. Did I say, “Yeah, I understand. I hurt for you as well.” when someone mentioned the pain of the loss? Yes, I did.\u00a0 Because of this, I was the target of a horrible attack.\u00a0 I was called out and in a BAD and UGLY way…publicly, where my children can read.<\/p>\n
Shaun’s heart is broken in a million pieces over this.\u00a0 It is something I have been struggling with since it was brought to my attention.\u00a0 No one should ever have to hear, “You have to read this…No, actually, don’t…it’s not good.” about themselves. No one should they have to defend themselves to strangers…let alone family.<\/p>\n
This person said she wasn’t going to lose sleep over any of this. Well, it’s 20 minutes to 5 am and i’m not sleeping.\u00a0 I’m hurt. I’m angry. I’m sad for my husband and his children.\u00a0 I’m debating over if I should even hit ‘publish’ because, ‘God Kristine, this is EXACTLY what they want! They want you to get upset!’\u00a0 Too late, I am upset. I am PISSED AS HELL.\u00a0 In a personal attack email I was told ‘I start shit. I stir it up.’\u00a0 I let it slide that time because I knew better than to feed the raccoon, this time…not going to happen.\u00a0\u00a0 You keep beating on the door, I will answer.<\/p>\n
I’m tired of letting other people be my voice for me.\u00a0 I can say exactly what I want and this is what I want to say; leave me alone. I don’t want to have anything to do with you.\u00a0 I won’t forget what you did or said about me. leave me alone. Don’t make people keep sending me the mean things you say about me.\u00a0 It’s unprovoked attacks. I haven’t talked to you for two months. Happily, I haven’t had ANY drama for those 2 months. I haven’t written a single thing or said a single thing for two months. leave me alone. what part of leave me alone do you not understand? <\/em><\/p>\n Forgive and Forget is what we are spose to do, right?\u00a0 I’m not ready to do either.<\/p>\n Like the Dixie Chicks said, “I ain’t ready to make nice.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I’m going to start this post with the image of me knocking my hand as hard as I can over and over again into the biggest piece of wood I can find. It’s been a long time since I’ve opened my email box and found anything other than something nice, words of wisdom and questions on ‘how do you do it?’ Thank you. Not that I really took the crap emails too seriously, but it’s nice they aren’t there anymore. I’m guessing that people are FINALLY not taking me seriously or the hit-man club I hired is doing it’s job. Recently I was reading a friend’s blog where she goes into the terrifying story of her being assaulted and robbed at gun point. In her comments, someone had the nerve to ask her if she had done something really bad in her past life.\u00a0 AS IF someone that was attacked at gun point needs to hear that? Because she did something bad in her “past life” that she deserves what happened to her? I like to call mean, hateful words spilled on the internet by people who like to stir shit up, “Internet Balls”.\u00a0 Yes, I said, Internet Balls. It’s currently under review by the editors of Urban Dictionary dot com for submission. I wonder if it will fly? Words are the most precious gift we have.\u00a0 We can build people up, offer support, write something that changes our world, or changes the life of a perfect stranger.\u00a0\u00a0 Why anyone would want to use that gift to beat someone up? *throwing up hands* Yes, I am guilty. No, I have never anonymously left a message on someone’s website and bashed them. I have bashed my ex-husband here. Most of the time it’s done out of love, but yes, he pisses me off.\u00a0 Let it be known, when I do write something about him, he is warned and told to either read or or shut up. A few months ago I called Shaun’s ex a drama-queen.\u00a0 Well, in my defense, I didn’t call her a drama-queen…I said I knew she was going to get all ‘drama’ on something that happened out of my control.\u00a0 So, what did I do? I called her and told her, “Dude, I called you a drama-queen. I know you’re going to hear about it and I wanted you to hear it from me first.”\u00a0 She laughed and asked me why and we talked about it. Don’t get me wrong, we have talked our share of shit. We don’t always see eye to eye. We can ride each other’s nerves to no end.\u00a0 But, I would like think that if she had something crappy about me she needed to say, she would say it to her best friend.\u00a0 I would hope that she wouldn’t post it on the internet for the world (and the children) to see.\u00a0 And yes, we are both guilty of it, but we have apologized and moved on. We are adults. *laughing* okay, whatever. Today I read something that went beyond anything I can comprehend.\u00a0 As a reminder, I do not live in a world where everything is happy and fluffy. My life is not perfect. What you read here is not my ENTIRE life and I leave SO much out, not because it’s nobodies business, but because Shaun gets all pissy and eyebrows crawl into his forehead if I do anything that can be construed as ‘drama’ or ‘starting shit’.\u00a0 In the last 4 years, I have to admit…it’s worked.\u00a0 If I manage to keep compacting my emotions and the things I feel I have a right to say; you know JAMMING the hurt down so it will keep the peace…EVERYTHING will be ALRIGHT.\u00a0 You are no stranger to my sarcasm, are you? He HAD a point though. “If you don’t feed it…it will go else where to find what it’s looking for.”\u00a0 So I just ignored it and like a starving raccoon, it did leave us alone. Until of course, the little thing gets hungry again and decides it doesn’t matter if I will answer the door, it’s going to bust in the damn thing and go all rabies on our asses. I should stop with the animal references. I am confusing myself and I will be blamed for calling someone a rabies filled raccoon. Our family is hurting. We have, in a sense, lost a family member.\u00a0 No one died, but it feels like it.\u00a0 We mourned the loss and then moved on.\u00a0 Even after the mourning process we all still wondered why we had to lose that part of the family.\u00a0 It hurts. Even after the horrible words that were said to me, I still worried about them. As the months passed, we had truly gotten over it and moved on with our lives.\u00a0 If someone doesn’t want to have anything to do with us, so be it. And then out of the blue…we are faced with horrible words. Guess who got thrown under the train?\u00a0 Yep, me.\u00a0 Why? I don’t know.\u00a0 I had NOTHING to do with anything. Did I say, “Yeah, I understand. I hurt for you as well.” when someone mentioned the pain of the loss? Yes, I did.\u00a0 Because of this, I was the target of a horrible attack.\u00a0 I was called out and in a BAD and UGLY way…publicly, where my children can read. Shaun’s heart is broken in a million pieces over this.\u00a0 It is something I have been struggling with since it was brought to my attention.\u00a0 No one should ever have to hear, “You have to read this…No, actually, don’t…it’s not good.” about themselves. No one should they have to defend themselves to strangers…let alone family. This person said she wasn’t going to lose sleep over any of this. Well, it’s 20 minutes to 5 am and i’m not sleeping.\u00a0 I’m hurt. I’m angry. I’m sad for my husband and his children.\u00a0 I’m debating over if I should even hit ‘publish’ because, ‘God Kristine, this is EXACTLY what they want! They want you to get upset!’\u00a0 Too late, I am upset. I am PISSED AS HELL.\u00a0 In a personal attack email I was told ‘I start shit. I stir it up.’\u00a0 I let it slide that time because I knew better than to feed the raccoon, this time…not going to happen.\u00a0\u00a0 You keep beating on the door, I will answer. I’m tired of letting other people be my voice for me.\u00a0 I can say exactly what I want and this is what I want to say; leave me alone. I don’t want to have anything to do with you.\u00a0 I won’t forget what you did or said about me. leave me alone. Don’t make people keep sending me the mean things you say about me.\u00a0 It’s unprovoked attacks. I haven’t talked to you for two months. Happily, I haven’t had ANY drama for those 2 months. I haven’t written a single thing or said a single thing for two months. leave me alone. what part of leave me alone do you not understand? Forgive and Forget is what we are spose to do, right?\u00a0 I’m not ready to do either. Like the Dixie Chicks said, “I ain’t ready to make nice.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1659","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-random"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1659","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1659"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1659\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1659"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1659"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1659"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}