{"id":1274,"date":"2007-01-13T22:18:04","date_gmt":"2007-01-14T05:18:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/?p=1274"},"modified":"2007-01-13T22:18:04","modified_gmt":"2007-01-14T05:18:04","slug":"pms-and-new-shoes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/?p=1274","title":{"rendered":"PMS and new shoes&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/farm1.static.flickr.com\/33\/353553053_fc2c880ddb.jpg\" \/><\/p>\n<p>The other day the two older girls had a meltdown that I&#8217;m sure you all heard.\u00a0 I don&#8217;t care what country you&#8217;re in, you HAD to hear it.\u00a0 It was the sound of Kara and Marina at each other&#8217;s throats.<br \/>\nWho would have guessed that telling them to &#8216;clean their room&#8217; was going to be an all out war that would end up with hysterical crying and me screaming at the top of my lungs, &#8220;IF YOU SAY, &#8220;FRIGGIN&#8221; one more time I am going to backhand you RIGHT in the mouth! WE CLEAR? WE CLEAR?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>I swear our house is an estrogen warehouse.\u00a0 We have enough estrogen for a small country that is running low.\u00a0 I don&#8217;t know how much more I can take of it.\u00a0\u00a0 The need to shake them until they start their periods is just overwhelming.<\/p>\n<p>After the meltdown I dropped Kara off with her dad, who she insisted that she might move with.\u00a0 When she said those words I contorted my face in such a way that I looked like one of those freaky Bratz dolls.\u00a0 &#8220;Oh hell no, you can just keep THINKIN&#8217; that, it&#8217;s not going to happen! You&#8217;re father will move in with US before that happens.&#8221;<br \/>\nI really should be careful throwing around threats like that though, because you know me&#8230;I would take him in too.<\/p>\n<p>Marina and I needed to find a way to bring ourselves back to normal levels.\u00a0 Milkshakes and new shoes seemed to do the trick.<br \/>\nI had been eyeballing those horrible clog looking shoes for awhile and I finally tried them on. HOLY HELL they were comfortable!\u00a0 I bought the black ones.\u00a0 Estrogen levels back to normal. Amen.<\/p>\n<p>Today as I was getting ready to leave Shaun asked if I was going to wear my strainer shoes.\u00a0 I knew what he was talking about, but wasn&#8217;t going to give him the glory of making fun of my clogs. I was going to wear them with pride.<br \/>\nAs I was walking down the hallway, Shaun yelled from the kitchen, &#8220;Look honey, I bought you an extra pair.&#8221;<br \/>\nHe stood there holding two black strainer spoons.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Shut up, Shaun.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>He then stated &#8220;How could I not like shoes that you can wear and strain spaghetti with at the same time?&#8221;<br \/>\nSmart ass.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The other day the two older girls had a meltdown that I&#8217;m sure you all heard.\u00a0 I don&#8217;t care what country you&#8217;re in, you HAD to hear it.\u00a0 It was the sound of Kara and Marina at each other&#8217;s throats. Who would have guessed that telling them to &#8216;clean their room&#8217; was going to be an all out war that would end up with hysterical crying and me screaming at the top of my lungs, &#8220;IF YOU SAY, &#8220;FRIGGIN&#8221; one more time I am going to backhand you RIGHT in the mouth! WE CLEAR? WE CLEAR?&#8221; I swear our house is an estrogen warehouse.\u00a0 We have enough estrogen for a small country that is running low.\u00a0 I don&#8217;t know how much more I can take of it.\u00a0\u00a0 The need to shake them until they start their periods is just overwhelming. After the meltdown I dropped Kara off with her dad, who she insisted that she might move with.\u00a0 When she said those words I contorted my face in such a way that I looked like one of those freaky Bratz dolls.\u00a0 &#8220;Oh hell no, you can just keep THINKIN&#8217; that, it&#8217;s not going to happen! You&#8217;re father will move in with US before that happens.&#8221; I really should be careful throwing around threats like that though, because you know me&#8230;I would take him in too. Marina and I needed to find a way to bring ourselves back to normal levels.\u00a0 Milkshakes and new shoes seemed to do the trick. I had been eyeballing those horrible clog looking shoes for awhile and I finally tried them on. HOLY HELL they were comfortable!\u00a0 I bought the black ones.\u00a0 Estrogen levels back to normal. Amen. Today as I was getting ready to leave Shaun asked if I was going to wear my strainer shoes.\u00a0 I knew what he was talking about, but wasn&#8217;t going to give him the glory of making fun of my clogs. I was going to wear them with pride. As I was walking down the hallway, Shaun yelled from the kitchen, &#8220;Look honey, I bought you an extra pair.&#8221; He stood there holding two black strainer spoons. &#8220;Shut up, Shaun.&#8221; He then stated &#8220;How could I not like shoes that you can wear and strain spaghetti with at the same time?&#8221; Smart ass.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1274","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-random"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1274","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1274"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1274\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1274"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1274"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/randomandodd.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1274"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}