Yeesh.

I had a super long, never ending conversation with my daughter tonight. I informed her that I was quitting my medication on Sunday. She freaked out on me.
“Mom, you can’t just quit ‘cold turkey’!! You’ll get really sick!”
“Don’t worry, I’ll be fine.”
“Mom, Please call your doctor and find out if it’s safe for you to quit like that. I know it’s not.”
“OK..MOM!”
“Mom, I’m not kidding. It’s not healthy to quit like that. It’s bad for you. You need to come off it slowly.”
“Kara, seriously. I will be fine.”
“CALL YOUR DOCTOR FIRST!”

While in the middle of a debate with my FOURTEEN year old daughter about if I can quit my medication, I decided to show her a little something about being older and wiser. I decided to throw a little internet knowledge IN HER FACE. I googled cold turkey celexa. Guess what? The little shit is right.

“Whoa…I could have seizures!”
“I told you Mom, you have to go slowly. Call your doctor first.”

I got my ass handed to me by a KID.

Guess what I will be doing on Monday? Yep, going to the doctor to SAFELY remove the drug from my system. I’m sort of afraid because from what I was reading…you don’t realize how much it works until you go off of it and you become a raging bitch.
I mean, I could TOTALLY handle being a raging bitch. I haven’t seen that side of me since the early 90’s. It’s only been less than a year that I have been on the medication so maybe I will be able to come back as less of a bitch? maybe? Who knows. I just feel sorry for those around me. They are going to get THEIR asses handed to them when they don’t walk the line.

I actually have a list of things I am going to make sure get done when I kick the anxiety bullshit;

1. THIS IS NUMBER ONE…UNO…MOST IMPORTANT — Get my damn lawn sprinklers working in the front yard and then tear it out and put in sod. If I have to figure out how to do it all by my damn self, I will do it. That fire in my belly is going to get me a new lawn!

2. Repaint my laundry room — I mean really, Dan…ORANGE? Why would you paint the laundry room the color of the burning sun?

3. Replace my windshield — Actually that really should be number one because after I get off the anxiety medication the fear of the windshield shattering in on me while I am driving isn’t going to sit well.

4. Finish the hall bathroom. Touch up, just doesn’t cover it.

5. Steam clean the living room…TWICE.

6. Get the back patio cover to not lean 4 feet to the right. Again…Dan…really. Reinforcements would have been nice.

7. Locate my waistline.

8. Ohana is back.

9. Out with the toxic people, In with the good.

10. Figure out what the big rage is about Zack Effron.

Now, you are asking yourself…why doesn’t she just do that stuff now, while ON the medication? Good question, and thanks for asking, caller. See right now, I DON’T REALLY GIVE A SHIT. I don’t really care enough to pester people about fixing the lawn or the bathroom. I don’t care that the living room smells like a dog kennel or that at any point, a brisk wind can and will knock over my whole patio cover. JUST DON’T CARE. One of the joys of medications is that when things that would normally happen that would cause you to stand up and say, “NO MORE” you just wave it off as if it were a pesky fly trying to land on your burger.
“Don’t bother me, I’m busing not stressing out.”

That there is my list. I’ve got a million lists going on right now actually. Mostly in my head, which makes for an awkward moment when I need to cross something off.
I’m writing more stuff down to get them in order.
AND that reminds me. Principle and Interest…that is some fucked up stuff right there. Go look at your bills. GO, I’ll wait. Look at the amount that is paid toward the PRINCIPLE. ZILTCH. What in tar-nations is that about? Someone needs to do something about that. It ain’t going to be me though, because really…I do not have the man power.

What’s on your list? (ha ha, I felt like that commercial, ‘what’s in YOUR wallet) forgive me, I’m 48 hours xanax free and feeling a bit loopy.