Airing out the dirty laundry…

Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random

One of the millions of reasons I love living so close to San Francisco is that we can throw a few kids in the van and drive down for the day on last minutes notice.

The girls had a dance on Friday and Kara looked out of this world beautiful, Click Here and agree with me. Saturday we gathered all the girls and each of them brought a friend with them for a ‘coast trip’.
These trips are normally fun because we just drive until we see the ocean and start squealing until Shaun can take it any longer and pulls over.
Half way there, I decided I wanted to see Coit Tower.  It has been about a million years since I had been there.  I remembered being able to see the whole city and what an awesome place to it would be to bring the girls to.
I remember as a teenager being driven up there in a limo when I had gone to my friend Bron Sullivan’s prom.   This time…we didn’t drive.   Shaun, being the evil son of bitch he is, thought we should take the stairs.

Looking up it didn’t seem to bad.  I mean, how many steps could it be? I could see the tower from the street.   You wanna know how many steps there are? A FUCKINTRIBILLION.  You wanna know how many times I had to stop and convince myself that I was certainly not going to die? You wanna know how many times I kicked myself in the ass for agreeing to this? You wanna know how many times I wanted to shove a Nikon D70  up Shaun’s ass?  A FUCKINGTRITRILLION.

Was it worth it? I don’t know. I hurt today so bad that I can’t bend my knees when I walk. The muscles on the back of my legs feel like I shoved lemons under the skin. KNOTS THAT BIG!

We then went to Haight and Ashbury.  When did this place become a little soho?  Where did all the stoned street performers go?  Where did the cool shops with funky jewelery go?  Everything was overpriced and the smell of pot no longer lingered out the smoke shops.  It was lame and I was so sorry for my poor, teenage children that they will never know the real Haight and Ashbury as it was before Apple and Starbucks bought it.

We ended the trip off to Pier 39.  Of course, we couldn’t escape the lure of the mini donuts. twice.   Kara insisted we watch the performer that does magic tricks. She got pulled on to stage, as did Shaun. THOSE pictures have to be edited before I can upload them. Kara did a cute duck call trick, but in a separate part of the show Shaun had to hold the pole for the tight rope walker.  I promised Shaun I wouldn’t put the ones up of her 54 year old crotch up on his head or the one where she is feeling him up without his approval.  I mean, come on…isn’t that what you do in a marriage? You don’t embarrass your husband with pictures like that.  Would you?  Okay, raise your hand if you would put pictures of an old lady using your husband as a latter to get on the tight rope?  Keep raising your hand if that woman was wearing a dress?  Keeeeeep raising them if you had a picture of riding his head and pulling his hair?
Put your hand down.
Now raise your hand if you’re going to PayPal me some money to help pay for my divorce.  Come on, I just told the whole internet that my husband had old person snatch on his head.

And then on to the part of the story that won’t get me smothered while I sleep;  Today I am paying the price for all the fun we had yesterday.  The only reason I am still typing and not rolling around in pain is because the warmth of the laptop on my legs is keeping me from screaming.